Happy 10th Anniversary to My Childhood Crush

This Thursday we celebrate 10 year of marriage, but I will never remember the day I first met my husband. I was far too young, just a little baby.

He was a cute 5 year old boy at my first birthday party! There is proof in pictures; I certainly have no recollection of this.

Adrian has four younger sisters, two that are almost exactly the same age as my older sister and me. From the time we were babies our mothers would visit together, and we would go out to the Seely farm to pick strawberries and string beans. We girls had many sleepovers, and I would totally be lying if I said Lilli and I didn't care about the fact that our friends had three older brothers :) That was so great!

I was probably only 8 or 9 when I had my first crush on Adrian. While his sister Angela and I were sitting in her room talking, he came in to show us this silly gadget he had just gotten. It looked like a mini satellite and enabled him to be in a room and point toward a wall to hear the conversation in the adjacent room. I was quite impressed...by both the gadget and the demonstrator...hehe. Of course, I kept this secret even though my friend suspected it.

When I was 14, he interrupted our Ping-Pong game wearing a cowboy hat and long dark coat. Those clear Seely blue eyes looked at me from under the dark rim of his hat, making him look so ruggedly handsome at 17...be still my heart.

But then he left. He went away to college in Canada for four years. I still remember thinking, By the time he comes back, I'll be older and prettier.

For the next six years, I only saw him twice. Once, at my high school graduation party and another time when our families went out ice skating during a college break.

Late into my junior year of college, I was going full speed ahead with my studies and preparing to be editor of the college paper my senior year when my little world was surprisingly interrupted. While working on my latest news article, an unknown instant message screen popped up (remember when IM was big?)  For about 5 minutes I bantered back and forth with this unknown person before Adrian revealed his true identity. Oh, this is kind of exciting! Next thing I knew, I was spending a lot of time at the computer hoping that IM name would pop up.

Adrian was actually an over-the-road truck driver at the time. (Fun Fact: he's been to every U.S. state except Hawaii!) Within a week he told me that he'd be "in my area" and asked to meet up. I later found out he actually had to drive hundreds of miles out of his way to be within an hour of me. We met up at a truck stop in Roanoke, Va. and I drove us over to Cracker Barrel for breakfast. He still laughs at me for ordering dessert for breakfast - French toast with candied peaches and whip cream. I ate every bite.

He had been involved in a couple relationships, while I'd had a few interests but nothing too serious. After that first date, he left the girl he was with and pursued me relentlessly. He is a romantic, much more than me actually. We had many ups and downs while dating, but less than a year later I said "Yes" when he proposed to me during one of his regular visits to Liberty University.

Our engagement photo, look at that young guy!

It was just one week after my 21st birthday, and yes I was nervous about being a Mrs. at such a young age. But here we are, still together 10 years later. It wasn't easy, but it's been so worth it.

Our wedding program read:

FIRST, CHILDHOOD PLAYMATES

THEN THE BEST OF FRIENDS

TODAY MAN AND WIFE

That's the story of how all of this really began. Happy 10th Anniversary, my Love!

Here we are today, actually about two weeks ago ;)

When will I go in the sky, Mommy?

Every night at the end of our routine, I snuggle into Adria's bed with both the girls and we read a story or two.

Tonight Johanna pulled a story off the bookshelf titled The First Easter. I don't think we've read the book since Easter, but it tells the story of Jesus' life and miracles, death on the cross, and His resurrection and ascension with colorful cartoons and child-friendly language.

The last page showed a picture of Jesus high in the clouds waving to the disciples as He ascended into heaven.

Adria seemed to ponder the page, then said, "How did Jesus get up there?"

Hmm, how best do I answer this? I replied, "His Father is God. He is able to do anything, and He lifted him up in the sky."

"I want to go up with Jesus in the sky," my insightful 5 year old responds.

"You will go with Jesus, honey. Everyone who loves Jesus will live with Him in heaven," I said, embracing this opportunity to share the most important thing she'll ever learn.

"When will I go in the sky, Mommy?" she says.

"Oh, mommy hopes that it's not for a long, long time. We go in the sky when we die." I said, maybe getting too deep but not wanting her to be in a hurry to go in the sky!

"But I want to go up like Jesus. I promise I'll come back," and there my little Adria brought a big smile to my face. I love the innocent mind of a child. She just wants to float through the clouds like Jesus, that sounds fun to me too!

On the one hand, I found her insistence to want to go in the sky slightly unnerving. On the other hand, I thoroughly enjoyed our little theological conversation and the chance to talk about Jesus.

Of course, Johanna was in the middle of it all shoving another book in our faces to be read! I just love these two.

These quiet moments and unplanned discussions with our children are so crucial to the foundation of their worldview as they grow. I fear that I have already missed many of these moments in my rush to get to the next thing, but I was thankful for our time tonight.

Johanna leading big sister through our backyard this morning. It usually goes that way with them ;)

 

O Canada, His Canada

I can remember being 10 when my Dad turned 35. My sister and I made a big deal that he was old enough to be the President; he seemed ancient to us :) My husband just turned 35 on Wednesday... it doesn't seem so old anymore.

But even though Adrian is old enough now, there is no way he's ever going to be a U.S. President (thankfully!). He is Canadian born.

He entered the world in a log cabin in the Canadian wilderness somewhere in Ontario. The third son born to his mother, he put a hurtin' on her with something close to 40 hours of labor! She is a seriously tough woman; after Adrian's arrival they returned to Delaware where she gave birth to five more babies.

Happy Birthday, Daddy

His parents were born and raised in Delaware, but they moved north just after getting married and have some incredible stories from the seven years they lived on a Canadian trap line with a small community of devout Christians.

I think being born in the wilderness, gave Adrian a love for it. He returned to Canada for college and gained a deep appreciation for this largely untamed land. His older brother did make his long-term home there in British Columbia with a special woman from the Yukon.

In 2007, the year before Adria was born, I had the chance to experience Canada with my husband. We took an impromptu road trip across the northern U.S., driving over 2,800 miles from Delaware to Washington state in just four days! We drove up into beautiful British Columbia and visited with his brother's family, then returned by way of Banff and Jasper National Parks in Alberta. Spectacular! It is known as one of the most beautiful drives in the world, and you really do have to see it to believe it. The snow-capped mountains, glaciers, and turquoise blue lakes stretched for miles in a stunning display of God's handiwork. I have lots of pictures if you ever want to see them.

After experiencing the splendor for myself, I could better understand his love for that land. I'm not sure that I could ever develop thick enough skin to withstand their winters, but the beauty takes your breath away. We had seen many interesting things across the miles of America, but nothing compared to what we saw in Canada.

I share all this because it's something so important to Adrian but often gets lost and forgotten in the day to day hum-drum of life. When better to reflect on the place of his birth than his birthday!

The words from the first few lines of the Canadian national anthem are quite true:

O Canada!
Our home and native land!
True patriot love in all thy sons command.

Banff National Park, Alberta, Canada

8 Months Seizure Free! It's a new record

This week is an exciting milestone for us.

It marks eight months since Adrian’s last seizure. This is the longest period of time my husband has gone without a seizure since the first one came on December 26, 2009!

We are so very thankful for this. We are thankful for your prayers. We are hopeful that this streak will continue.

Adrian may actually be able to get his license back soon. There is still some risk, but we would be cautious and I would continue to be the one driving the girls around for a while. At least he would be able to get to the state parks and play disc golf without having to rely on me or another ride! As he says, he wouldn't feel so much like a "toadstool" anymore. He does a lot of work around the house and is a great stay-at-home dad for the girls, but he is confined to the house all day, every day while I'm at work... No play dates or trips to the library, just the house and backyard.

I would go crazy. No really, I would. He knows that too.

We live in the country, so there's nothing within walking distance except for the model home where I often work. Fortunately, he gets the occasional break when my mom or his mom comes by and takes him and the girls for a ride.

Being unable to drive is one of the cruelest side affects of a seizure. About 99% of the time Adrian would be perfectly fine behind the wheel and more aware than I am, but it's that 1% chance that has made it too risky. Plus, Delaware forces you to revoke your license for six months following a seizure. It's been eight months, so his neurologist can now sign the necessary authorization for him.

Adrian has had a couple close calls but never had an episode while driving. We have seen God's hand of protection over him and those around him when a seizure happens - for the most part, at least.

As always, we hope that they are over. But the reality is, we still have our guard up.

Last night, we enjoyed an evening with friends and family celebrating the upcoming 60th Birthday of Adrian's Dad as well as Adrian's 35th birthday and that of his brother-in-law. We had a chance to visit with some of his extended family for the first time since our return to Delaware in April. His mom did a great job planning this event at Abbott's Grill in Milford, very much outside her norm!

However, Adrian and I both felt a twinge of concern that something would happen that night. Adrian had played in two disc golf tournaments over the weekend that kept him outside all day Saturday and Sunday. He had fun but was exhausted. Many of his seizures have come during times of exhaustion.

Adrian and his group of four Advanced disc golf players during Saturday's tournament at Trap Pond State Park. I was able to join him for the first time at a tournament. Fun but chilly and long ;)



On the way home from the party we realized that we had both separately had a feeling of deja vu that he would have a seizure that evening. Fortunately, the feelings were unfounded. Maybe it was just so we would say an extra prayer, because thankfully there was no sign of a seizure. 

As we celebrate many birthdays, our anniversary and Thanksgiving this November, we have so much to be thankful for, but at the top of the list is the absence of Daddy's falls. Not needing to get back up again. That is good.

Our Crazy Family Timeline - 9 moves in 10 years!

Is it possible for a family to move 9 times in 10 years and not have it related to the military or job loss? Why yes, yes it is. We did.

Please understand that I am in no way bragging or complaining about this; I'm simply acknowledging a measure of craziness!

The moves were by choice, yet each one had a reason motivating it. At the time, they all seemed legitimate and the best decision. In hindsight, we can pick apart our motives and question some moves, but that serves no beneficial purpose. We've created great memories and met wonderful people like you along the way.

Suffice it to understand that Adrian and I share a love for adventure and new experiences. Be it also understood that we are very tired of packing and unpacking, finding new doctors, buying and selling houses, and figuring out how to find our way around.

Since we regularly reference various points and places in our journey, I thought it best to provide an overview of our timeline. There's no possible way anyone has kept up with this - probably not even our families ;)

Our Family Timeline - 9 in 10

1. Nov. 2003: Greenwood, Del. - We married. A young couple in our early 20s excited for the future! We started off renting his aunt's home west of Greenwood, Del.
• Spring 2004 - I left my part-time job as a reporter for a weekly paper, to take a marketing position with a large construction management firm in Wilmington, Del.
2. Late Summer 2004: Bear, Del. - The 88 mile one-way commute was brutal, so we rented an apartment in northern Delaware. We lived on the 3rd floor and never really adjusted to the area.
3. Summer 2005: Dover, Del. - We had become youth leaders at our church back down south in Greenwood, so we found a halfway point at a cute house in downtown Dover. Now, we had officially lived in all 3 of Delaware's counties!
4. Winter 2005/2006: Greenwood, Del. - Adrian's grandmother passed away and we moved into her home, next door to his parents on the family farm. During this time, we embraced an opportunity to build our first home on a plot of the family's land. 
5. Summer 2006: Greenwood, Del. - We moved into a beautiful, blue 2700 s.f. ranch home with an upstairs bonus room. Adrian had poured a lot of labor the previous six months into this custom-built home. We built the home with the intent that we'd raise our family there. It was here where we managed to stay the longest, nearly four years. Much happened during that time.

• Summer 2007 - We both left our jobs in the midst of drama and set out for a spontaneous cross-country roadtrip from Delaware to Washington state. Upon our return, we both managed to find new jobs. I in new home sales and he in commercial railing sales - thus beginning the roller coaster of living on commission income.
• Fall 2007 - It was the year of weddings, and Adrian officiated for his younger sister in October, making that his fourth wedding of the year. Weeks later, I ran my first marathon of 26.2 miles through the hills of San Francisco, California. Less than 2 months later, I was pregnant for the first time.
• Spring 2008 - My 20 week ultrasound showed that our baby was a girl, and she had spina bifida-myelomeningocele. Our world changed.
• September 2008 - Our beautiful little Adria was born at Christiana Hospital and taken to A.I. DuPont Children's Hospital within hours for her first surgery. It was during our stay in the hospital when the major market crash of 2008 happened, dramatically impacting both of our jobs. Adrian was laid off even before I returned to work from maternity leave.
• Spring 2009 - Adria became only the 8th child in the U.S. to have an incredible new brain surgery to treat hydrocephalus (fluid on the brain). Her pediatric surgeon was incredible and the surgery has been a huge success!
• December 2009 - The day after Christmas Adrian's first seizure occurred, but we did not realize what it was until he had two more within weeks. His license was suspended and a flurry of inconclusive medical tests ensued. 
• Spring 2010 - The housing market continued to struggle. My income dramatically lessened while the medical bills piled up. Time for a drastic change. We put our home up for sale; we had a contract within 2.5 weeks. A bittersweet time. 
6. May 2010: Indianapolis, In. - We packed up our belongings into a huge Penske truck and traveled 12 hours+ west to Indianapolis, Indiana. My company allowed me to transfer to the new Indianapolis division that was growing quickly with the more affordable prices of the Midwest. The weekend of the Indy 500 we moved into an apartment with the help of Adrian's parents and some friends who lived out there.
7. January 2011: Greenwood, In. - Sales were going well and homes were more affordable to own than rent, so I took advantage of my company discount and built a new home in Greenwood, Indiana. Yes, we built two homes in two very different "Greenwoods"...gotta love the irony! Adria became more mobile with her walker and leg braces in the extra space our new home provided. However, the week before we moved in, I had a miscarriage 10 weeks into my pregnancy. We found favor, and I was soon expecting again.

• Summer 2011 - Adrian had more seizures after the move, but he seemed to have found the right medication. He returned to work for the first time since Adria's birth, back in sales but this time he tried insurance. Before long, he excelled and was working on the top floor of a high rise with a great view, managing marketing for an insurance training group. Adria was in daycare for the first time and started to walk without her walker! It was a happy time for us.
• December 2011 - I gave birth to our second daughter, precious Johanna at a hospital in Indianapolis. She was healthy and perfect...except for the constant baby spit up.
• January 2012 - Unfortunately, Adrian's new found success was not to last when a series of three seizures in a month's time, set him back and again took away his ability to drive. His youngest sister moved out to be a live-in nanny for us, as I returned to work and Adrian struggled to recover.
• Spring 2012 - With a new baby and other changes, the 600 mile distance between us and family turned out to be too much. We put our new home on the market less than 18 months after moving in. It sold within a few months at a break even price.
8. Summer 2012: Chesterfield, Va. - Again I took advantage of an opportunity to transfer with my company, and we moved to the growing Richmond, Va. region. We crazily put an offer on a home in a suburban golf community the first day we toured it. It was our first used home purchase, and with 5 bedrooms and 3.5 baths, it was the largest home we bought. We wanted the extra rooms for guests and Ade's sister who made the move with us.



The tulips that Ade and his sister Leona planted began to bloom just before we left Chesterfield.

9. Spring 2013: Bridgeville, Del. - Though we enjoyed our time in Virginia, circumstances brought us back to Delaware in dramatic yet near miraculous fashion that included a new job, renters for our home, and a place to rent. Read here for the details. The home we rent now is barely half the size of the one we just left, but the simplicity is almost refreshing.



The cozy home we currently live in; it's got a great yard.

Adria affectionately refers to our homes by color: the blue house, brown house, white house and green house. I guess that helps her remember!

It is almost surreal to look back at all these events...and exhausting. Our families have assisted so often and so much with the moves, I'm sure they're hoping we stay put for a while! But really, we never know what is to come.

Our Princess celebrating Halloween?

October had barely begun when Adria announced that she wanted to be a princess for Halloween.

This may seem completely normal, however we have never really celebrated Halloween. My husband and I both grew up in conservative households where our parents chose not to participate due to the pagan origins of the holiday. They likely agreed with what this article discusses about Christians celebrating Halloween, and how it's best just to create an alternative.

Ironically, the alternative Halloween celebration we grew up with usually involved Adrian and I celebrating together as children. That's right, we have known each other my entire life; he was always the cute older brother of one of my best friends.

Since my family lived in town, my parents would drive us out to the Seely's farmhouse in the country, far from trick-or-treaters, and we would play games and make yummy popcorn balls. (Here's a video recipe if you've never tried these!)

It was a fun time for our families, and now holds special memories for Adrian and I.

But we never did trick-or-treat and neither has Adria. It's not something we've felt strongly against, but she is easily frightened of scary-looking things. At such a young age, I've been concerned about taking her out amidst many older children who may be dressed in frightening costumes.

Until this year, there has been little discussion in our home about Halloween.

However, Halloween has been exuberantly talked about and celebrated at Adria's pre-school the entire month of October. Plus, all the cartoons she enjoys applaud the wonder of this costume and candy-filled holiday. Her teachers and bus drivers ask, "What are you going to be for Halloween?" to which she excitedly responds, "A Princess!" as if there were no other option.

At this point, it would actually be cruel of me as a mother to say, "No, sweetie, we don't celebrate Halloween." How would her five year old mind grapple with that, as all her other pre-school friends excitedly make plans for the holiday?

On Thursday, October 31, she was proudly adorned in her Rapunzel dress and tiara as she got on the school bus, which is provided by the state for pre-school children with "challenges." The bus drivers hooted and whistled at our cute, little Princess.

Her pre-school is actually located within the local public high school, where the older students can assist her teachers and learn about early childhood development. That Halloween afternoon, they took Adria's class of 23 costumed kids trick-or-treating to different classrooms through-out the high school.

The parents were invited to join in afterwards for a little party and snack. And my little princess was so excited to see that I had been able to step away from work for an hour and bring sister Johanna to be there with her! Her teachers told me she was such a trooper walking so far through the school, even if they did have to slow the pace at the end somewhat for her.

Adria with her classmates at their Pre-school Halloween Party

 

Sister Johanna, Little Bo Peep, made herself a part of the fun

 

Now that Adria had a bag full of candy and her first trick-or-treat experience under her belt, we decided to spend the evening resurrecting a long past Halloween tradition. We took Princess Adria and Little Bo Peep Johanna to Granny Seely's house for pizza, popcorn balls, and fun time with their cousin Ireland a.k.a. Princess Sofia the First.

Precious Princess Cousins at Granny's house

Halloween can be a controversial holiday in the Christian community, but I do think Matt Slick from CARM.org did a good job discussing the topic. It's best to be aware of what the holiday is and educate your children when they are ready, but any child loves the chance to dress up and get lots of candy!

A Nostalgic Visit to my Alma Mater 10 years later

That was a day of wide-eyed wonder for me, my college graduation in May 2003 at Liberty University in Lynchburg, Va.

At 21 years old, I felt the energy and thrill of all the future could hold. I was recently engaged, though I never thought I'd be one of the Liberty girls to leave with a ring on her finger, and I had filled my years at Liberty with all types of activities including novice on intercollegiate debate team, SGA vice president of junior class, editor-in-chief of the Liberty Champion, and bus captain for an inner city children's ministry. I didn't sleep much.

Truth be told, I was a bit of a nerd in college. I was just 17 when I started and in four years I earned two bachelor's degrees, Communications/Print Journalism and History, with a final GPA of 3.83 in the honor's program.

At the time, all of this seemed to matter and be the tools I needed to become a huge success. I was not quite sure in what, but I just knew I was going to do something of significance. An opportunistic, innocent and naïve dreamer I was. I have to chuckle a little when I think of her, that girl ten years ago.

Life is so very much different now than I had ever imagined. But I wouldn't trade my husband and two little gems for anything more "significant."

On October 18-19 I returned to Liberty and found a very different place than I remembered. It only looked vaguely familiar to me with the vast expansion around the now 7,000 acre campus and a total of more than 92,000 students both on campus and the online program. It's apparently the seventh largest college in the country these days.

But all of my college achievements meant little as I returned and looked for familiar faces. I did visit with a friend I hadn't seen since she was in our wedding (also almost 10 years ago!) and ran into a few others who I recognized.

I also met a new friend while I was at the 30th Anniversary Party for the Liberty Champion. She was a student who heard me mention that my daughter has spina bifida, and she quickly shared that her 1.5 year old niece does too. We spent the next few minutes talking about braces, catheterizing, shunts, and all the things common to spina bifida but little known by most. It was a special bonding moment, and now I follow her sister's blog!

As I drove the 5 hour ride back to Delaware with Adrian, I couldn't stop thinking about a message for today's students. Though I doubt they'll ever read it, these were my thoughts...
 

Here's a quick video I made from the rooftop of DeMoss Hall, pictured above.
http://youtu.be/hlvG0EnUMrg

Visiting Liberty, ten years later

You should be warned, Liberty student. Ten years will pass quickly.

You will be in your 30s standing in front of DeMoss thinking, “Has a decade really passed since I was here?”

At least that’s how I felt after returning to the Liberty campus for only the second time since I graduated ten years ago. It is truly shocking and quite impressive how much a place can change in that amount of time.

Returning “home” to LU during Homecoming was a bit like time travel. Suddenly, everything I’ve done and all the places I’ve been faded to the background as my mind’s eye relived my experiences those four years I spent at Liberty.

I was just you. Dreaming big, studying hard, and experiencing the daily joys and trials of college life – all with the full potential of what life could offer right in front of me. Now, I want to caution you. Do not take these precious years for granted. Soak in the wisdom from your professors and countless speakers and appreciate the fellowship of friends. You will miss that.

There is so much more to do at Liberty. Ten years ago there was no Campus East or Campus North and the Hancock center was readily overlooked. You have an ice rink, skiing, pools, and impeccable sports fields all around you to keep you active. These are all wonderful things, most of which are new to me, but they are just things.

People are what matter. I encourage you to invest your college years into building relationships with people who can be a support and friend to you for years to come. You have the best opportunity for that right now. I only had the chance to see a few people I knew, but that was the best part of the visit by far.

The familiar faces will be welcome as LU continues to grow and change. It was almost difficult to find places that were familiar to me ten years ago, hidden amidst the grandeur of what this campus has become.

But I found those familiar places.

The Circle Dorms 26, 27 and 28 are where I stayed all four years. Those long halls and cinder block walls became home to me. Shout out to those of you living there now!

The Vines Center is mostly as I remember. Though it’s sad to think that Dr. Jerry Falwell, Sr. no longer takes the stage. I can still hear him detailing his dreams for Liberty University and his vision of training hundreds of thousands of Champions for Christ. Though he is no longer with us, his dream seems more alive than ever.

The Prayer Chapel was the final and most familiar place. It sits on that hill so unassuming in its refreshing simplicity. The dark interior still holds the same wooden pews and humble stage with a piano tucked in the corner. This was the place where I most felt at home.

It’s a place that’s easily overlooked, but you should go there sometime. Alone. And pray. It can quiet your spirit in the midst of any storm.
It is in those quiet moments alone in His presence is where you are truly given the strength to become a Champion. You are here for a reason, Liberty student. Make the most of your next ten years.

The Hancock Center that we are standing in is new, but this is about the spot

where Adrian proposed to me on Feb. 15, 2003

One of the few things that remained the same from 10 years ago, the Prayer Chapel.

For many more photos from our visit, check out the Returning to Liberty photo album on my facebook page.