Our 2018 Highlight Reel

No Christmas cards were mailed out from the Seely home this year. I usually send out over 100 cards with our smiling faces on them, but it just didn’t happen. And truthfully, I have no regrets. But sorry if you missed getting one.

Our Family at the Spina Bifida Assoc. Christmas Party

Instead, I’ll spend a few minutes spewing out some thoughts about our year, if you care to know how 2018 panned out in this house.

We started off the year with the girls trying something new and both taking a gymnastics class, which they really enjoyed. This fall Johanna went back to gymnastics, but Adria really wanted to take a martial arts class so she’s trying that out…and looks totally adorable in her white uniform.

Adria turned 10 in September! And just like that, we are officially parents to a child in the double digits. She continues to amaze us with her hard work, determination and spirit. She is a straight A student in her 4^th grade class, and this year was accepted into the Gifted and Talented Program at her school. And let me tell you, they have some seriously challenging assignments in that class, but it’s given her the opportunity to stretch herself and I see a budding writer in her. #proudmama

Adria in her martial arts outfit

Just a couple weeks ago, we had the opportunity to become part of the Spina Bifida Association of the Eastern Shore (Maryland) and participate in their annual Christmas party. What a wonderful experience for Adria to meet so many others, including several girls her age, who were also born with Spina Bifida. They enjoyed crafts, food and gifts from Santa while the parents feasted on a delicious meal. Adria keeps asking when we can get together with them again J

Johanna recently celebrated her 7^th birthday with a few of her “Besties”. Our spunky, fun and sensitive little girl makes friends wherever she goes with her bubbly personality. We’ve enjoyed watching her grow and learn to read in first grade, where she also earned straight A’s the first marking period. So thankful for wonderful teachers at the local public school! The girls are both riding the bus to and from school for the first time this year, so that’s been helpful in getting them to school on time (cough) and mommy getting to work early more often.

Judah is ready for Christmas!

Judah is growing fast and this 3 year old spends much of his time playing with trains, trucks, dirt, water, and balls. Total boy and Daddy loves it. They continue to have a special bond, spending their days together while the girls are away. Judah does go to preschool in Milford two days a week in a class with six boys and a girl. He loves his big sisters, especially messing with them while they're playing or coloring.

Adrian celebrated a milestone birthday, turning 40 in November. His birthday wish was to have all his siblings in town together, and it came true! They came from British Columbia, Texas, Ohio and locally so the 7 of them ate dinner together at his parent’s table for the first time in 11 years. So special!

In November, Adrian turned 40 and we
celebrated 15 years of marriage.

Another big milestone came on Thanksgiving Day, which was also our 15^th Wedding Anniversary. We actually celebrated it in October when we took a week-long trip to Maui, Hawaii (without the Kids)! It was a long flight, but a beautiful place where we experienced many exciting things. My first helicopter ride over the island of Molokai literally took my breath away, and a couple’s zip-lining adventure had us laughing through the air in the rain and posing with rainbows. With this trip, Adrian has now officially been to all 50 of the United States of America!!!

I completed my third full marathon while in Maui. And those were the most difficult 26.2 miles I’ve run/walked yet… Though I had trained for months, I was not prepared for the trifecta of Heat, Hills, and Humidity along the lovely Pacific coast. It took me an hour longer to complete than my other 2 marathons, but I crossed that finish line on my own two feet and came in 250 out of 552 runners! I continue to run 5K races and just posted my best time ever of 26:15.

Getting ready to run in Maui

It’s been an interesting year for me in new home sales with lots of activity some months and very little others, but it looks like I’ll finish 2018 with a strong December. I recently sold my largest home in 11 years of doing this and am excited to see it built with great views of a Delaware bay!

One other major event happened earlier this year; on February 20 my amazing Dad went into cardiac arrest and we briefly lost him. It was a frightening time, but our community came together in prayer and support and Dad miraculously recovered. We are thankful beyond words.  Then in July, Dad and Mom were able to celebrate their 40^th Anniversary.

It was another year full of life, love, struggle, laughter and tears. And we are thankful for it. And for YOU sharing with us in it.

MERRY CHRISTMAS AND HAPPY NEW YEAR!

A beautiful sunset on the Pacific that we experienced in Maui

Helicopter ride over Molokai island

Merry Christmas 2017

Christmas Eve.

It's a quiet evening at home with my family. Just the five of us. Munching on snacks, watching movies, and maybe a little dancing around the Christmas tree later.

When I was a little girl I used to love dancing to carols in the soft light of the tree, so my kids are learning to enjoy this simple thrill. Daddy had to put soft pads on the coffee table feet because we keep moving it out of the way, and though our laminate floor is fairly scratch resistant, we should at least try to be careful...

It's our first Christmas in our new Home.

Family Christmas Photo courtesy JCP Portrait Studio.

It was not a great experience but the pictures turned out nice.

And to all those who had to ask for our new address for Christmas cards...again...I'm really hoping you won't have to ask that question for many, many years. Maybe ever???

That was our big news for 2017. Building our new home on the Seely family farm where Adrian grew up. Of course, we had Bay to Beach Builders construct the home and we love it! We got the keys on St. Patrick's Day, March 17, and have been working on getting settled in ever since.

About a month later, we celebrated Judah's 2nd birthday on our backyard deck. He's grown so much since then that people rarely believe me when I say he's only two. He is still passionate about tractors, monster trucks, fire engines, and pretty much anything on wheels. Daddy has trained him well to have good manners, often saying Please, Thank you and "Are you OK?"  Judah's sisters love him dearly, as long as he's not messing with their toys or games (which is fairly often...)

Big sister Johanna just turned 6 in early December. She is as energetic and vibrant as ever, making friends everywhere she goes. Kindergarten is going well and it's great watching her learn to read and write. Sometimes all that energy makes it hard for her to sit still in class, especially when talking with her two buddies. Her sweet smile took on a new look when she lost both her front teeth the same week at the beginning of the school year.

Biggest sister Adria is now a 9 year old third grader! She just had a very busy month as she participated in the local High School theatrical production of Miracle on 34th Street, which she absolutely loved. She continues to excel in school, earning straight A's and Student of the Month honors. The teachers and school staff continue to amaze me with how they care for her and her unique needs, even buying her a special scooter to help with her long walk to the playground.

Mommy's big accomplishment for the year was training for and running a full marathon - 26.2 miles on October 21, starting at the Dover Downs Speedway. It was very difficult but motivating, so I ran a half marathon on Johanna's birthday, Dec. 2, and finished the 13.1 miles in 2 hours and 10 minutes. Otherwise, I stay busy selling new homes full time and raising these three kiddos.

Johanna - 6, Adria - 9, Judah - 2

Daddy's year has been very active with moving into the new home and spending countless hours on landscaping and trying to make a once heavily wooded property, a beautiful lawn. When Adrian is not busy cleaning house and caring for the little ones, he gets out disc golfing and has recently become more interested in hunting, both shot gun and bow.

We give thanks to God for His blessings this year. May you have a blessed Christmas and Happy New Year!!!

With Love,
The Seelys

Christmas Eve in our Living Room

 

Why I ran a Marathon again. 10 years later.

Runners from across the country, even as far away as Denmark, gathered around Miles the Monster at Dover International Speedway on Saturday morning, October 21 for the seventh annual Monster Mash Marathon.

Among them was me, Julleanna Seely - 35 year old mother of three, participating in my second full marathon exactly ten years after running my first marathon.  I was one of about 200 participants running the 26.2 mile distance through Dover and Little Creek area, while another 300 ran the 13.1 mile half marathon, with all proceeds supporting the Wounded Warrior Project.

I crossed the finish line 4 hours 49 minutes and 41 seconds after the 7:00 a.m. start. At this 11 minute per mile pace, I finished almost an hour and a half after the lead female runner but I was still pleased with the result. I was hot and barely plodding along with no runners around when I came near the end, but I was rallied on those final steps of the endurance run with cheers from my children, parents, brother and mother in law at the Finish!

Knowing my family was waiting at the finish gave me the strength to push on and keep running through those long, hot final miles. My goal was to beat the time of my first marathon, which took 5 hours and 2 seconds, so I’m happy with a finish more than 10 minutes faster. I actually ran the first half of the marathon with a great time of 2 hours 12 minutes, but at mile 16 the weariness started to hit and the second half took much longer.

Much has changed since I ran the Nike Women’s Marathon 10 years ago in San Francisco, California. At that time I was 25 and married 4 years to Adrian, but we had no children yet. Running a marathon was a life goal, even though my longest race prior to the start of training in 2007 was just a 5K, which is 3.1 miles.

I always knew I would run a marathon again, but life brought many setbacks in the years that followed.I had run some over the years since, and even completed three half marathons, but I was not a consistent runner. Earlier this year, I was feeling lazy and at my heaviest I had ever been more than a year post pregnancy. A weight-loss challenge at work in the spring kick-started my desire to get healthier and run more.

When I realized this summer that October 21 would be the ten year anniversary of my big run, I knew it was time. It was my way of facing all those hardships from the past and saying…I am not beat down. I am stronger. I am better. I can do anything with Christ who strengthens me!

In late July, I set up a training program with the Runkeeper App on my phone and went from running about 15-20 miles per month to over 70 and even 117 miles in September.

THE TEN YEARS BETWEEN MY MARATHONS

It was just a few months after the first marathon, when Adrian and I found out we were expecting our first child. It was a very exciting time until an ultrasound around 20 weeks gestation revealed that our baby had a severe birth defect called Spina Bifida, myelomeningocele.  Doctors explained how the spinal cord had not formed properly and protruded from the lower back which could result in challenges including some paralysis often requiring a wheelchair for mobility, lack of bowel/bladder control, fluid build-up on the brain, possible learning delays and much more. Then they gave us the option to terminate the pregnancy. Despite the difficult news, we had also just learned our baby was a girl, and we were prepared to love and raise her, no matter the challenge.

Today, our daughter Adria is a nine-year old third grader who is precious and loved by all who know her. She is a straight A student who is actively involved in her school and community and easily recognized walking through the halls with her colorful leg braces and big smile.

A year after Adria was born, our little family faced another difficult health surprise when my 31 year old husband had a series of three grand mal seizures, causing significant physical and mental pain. Multiple tests and years of doctors visits never pin-pointed a reason for the seizures or a cure, just lots of different medications. Adrian has continued to sporadically have seizures since, often a few times a year and going 18 months seizure free at the longest period.  They were intense and painful seizures, sometimes causing major injury and hospital visits. 

Financial struggles as a result of medical expenses and a bad housing market resulted in us selling our home in Delaware in 2010 and moving to Indianapolis, Indiana. We had some great experiences there and one of the big blessings during this season was that our sweet Adria learned to use a walker for mobility at age 2, then she took her first steps without a walker just before turning 3.

But the challenges continued in early 2011 when I had a miscarriage at 10 weeks gestation that resulted in emergency surgery – a painful and heart-breaking time.   

It was not long before I became pregnant again and beautiful baby Johanna was born at the end of that year. She was healthy and a great blessing but in the early months of her life, I found myself battling a severe case of post-partum depression. In the heart of that lonely Indiana winter, Adrian had back-to-back seizures that left him unable to help much and I spent weeks of my maternity leave crying and battling health insurance issues.

Adrian’s youngest sister came to live with us and be a Nanny to the girls, so I could go back to work. She learned to clean up Johanna's regular spit up and care for Adria’s unique needs, like catheterization and putting on her leg braces. Still, the 12+ hour distance between us and our family back in Delaware was too great.

In late summer 2012, we moved back east to a charming community in Chesterfield, Virginia where we would be just 3 hours from our parents. I worked for the same company during these moves, with my sales ability allowing fairly easy transfers within Ryan Homes, one of the largest home builders in the country. Adrian really loved life in Virginia, but when his seizures reappeared in a serious way, we knew we needed the support of family just minutes away.

Only 8 months later, I took a new job with a local home builder in the town of Greenwood where our parents live and we moved back to Delaware in spring 2013. Two years later, we were blessed with a precious baby Boy. Judah was cute as could be and brought renewed life and hope to his discouraged Daddy.

My pregnancy with him was much harder on my body than the girls and I gained a lot more weight, but he was happy and healthy and my heart was full of thanks. And then life’s challenge became balancing the demands of a special needs child in school, an energetic pre-schooler, a nursing newborn and a full-time job as sole income provider!

With Adrian’s unfailing support and expertise as a stay-at-home Dad, we found a rhythm of life and 2016 was by far the most successful sales year of my career. It was also the year we decided to build our New Home, a place we would plan to stay for many years and raise our family. A home built on the same land where Adrian ran through the woods as a child. A place of hope and healing for us.

We moved into our Dream Home in March 2017.

When summer hit, and I realized that this year marked 10 years since I took on the challenge of running a full marathon, I reflected on these last 10 years. All the pain, all the trials, all the joys, all the moves, all the unknowns, all the life they have held. I felt like this season needed a book-end. I took on the challenge of a marathon before some of life’s greatest challenges came along. I was strong enough to take on the challenge now!

So I did. I woke up at 6 a.m. three mornings a week, and I ran. And on October 21, 2017 I ran 26.2 miles (with some walking) and completed my second full marathon. It was hard, but I was victorious!

As I look to the next decade of my life, I am full of HOPE.

Hope that my husband can live a seizure-free life.
Hope that my daughter Adria can continue to succeed in school and her life pursuits, not letting spina bifida hold her back.
Hope that all my children can live and grow in a consistent, stable home environment.
Hope for my own dreams of writing more and continuing to Run. 
Thank you, God, for Hope.         

5 Going on 15

Her energy and spunk is unmatched. She is a vibrant free spirit, daring you to cross her path. She has a sensitive heart, easily touched by loss or sadness. She is a princess and a fashion diva. She is a dark-haired, blue eyed beauty. She is 5 going on 15.

That's our little Johanna Belle!

Johanna on the right with her cousin Sophie, who also has a December birthday and will be 9.

CELEBRATIONS

Yesterday we celebrated her fifth birthday. She shared cupcakes and snacks with her friends in afternoon pre-school, that's in the same public school where her big sister Adria attends second grade. And in the evening, Mommy rushed home from work to pack up the girls, helium balloons, and decorations and grab the cake and fruit tray. Then drive south to the Stratosphere Trampoline Park, where we barely made it in time for her 6:30 party. But we did!

Johanna and a few friends spent the next hour and a half jumping and running around a building full of trampolines. Pretty fun once you got past the overwhelming stench of stinky feet and sweat. Ha! I was thankful the party came together successfully after a day, where I had "dropped the ball" on so many other things that I may as well have been swimming in giant ball pit...

Trampoline Park = perfect place for Johanna to let her energetic side be free!

And there were LOTS of trampolines and some good friends

Party Time

Last Saturday, we enjoyed a little celebration that my mom planned for Johanna and her cousin Sophie, who turns 9 in December. It was a special day for my sister and I, along with our three daughters to spend together with my mom at the American Girl store in Tyson's Corner. They have a very pink Cafe with a birthday luncheon menu that also includes a personal cake, ice cream and fun goody bag for the dolls, who sat in their booster seats with us.

Three cousins enjoying a special birthday lunch at the American Girl Cafe and store last weekend!

When the day first started our birthday girl, Johanna, was in a grump-tastic mood...Irritating...but thankfully, she calmed down and we were all able to enjoy this unique experience.

SENSITIVE FASHIONISTA

I say that Johanna is 5 going on 15, not because I want to rush her growing up in any way, but because this girl is always surprising me with the mature nature of what she wants.

In her perfect world, she wears a dress with tights and high heels every day. But that's not always appropriate, so we often have the "what to wear" battle. She loves to try on big sister's play make-up. She wants to dye her hair, paint her nails, and she regularly wears about 10 bracelets on her wrist. She has even asked me how soon she can start shaving her legs!! Spare me...

At school, her teachers say she is their little fashionista. Her style is bold, colorful and nearly always involves a dress or skirt. Jeans are an absolute NO. Only leggings are acceptable.

Johanna loves to sing and dance, and she's provided great entertainment for her little brother Judah for the full 19 months of his life. He's laughed at her more than anyone else and is generally patient with her extra strong hugs and forceful kisses.

This year we've seen Johanna begin to excel in her learning. She's taken longer than her sister to conquer ABCs and 123s but is making great progress. She'll spend time looking at books and magazines, though the iPad is definitely preferred.

I love her adventurous spirit. When we brought the kids to Hershey Park this summer, she wanted to ride all the FAST rides that her big sister was afraid of. And she was deeply disappointed that she was too short for the roller coasters, except for the smaller one.

Yet behind this wild, fashionista exterior lies a soft heart full of Love. She often randomly says, "I love our family! I love everyone!"  She's become the first to volunteer to say prayers at the dinner table, even if it's a big family dinner with many gathered. She remembers her great-grandma (my maternal grandmother) who died two years ago and who she only saw a few times.

Just recently Johanna said, "I really miss Great-Grandma. I don't remember what she looks like. I really love her a lot." Then tears fell down her sweet cheeks. There are moments when she cries easily because her heart is touched. Even a child's story I read the other night about a boy and his mother growing up had her crying. Ok, ok, I shed a few tears too. It's a sensitivity she carries that is not always obvious.

And tonight, as is the case every night, she has her two favorite blankets with her in bed, the pink bear and green fuzzy froggy blankets (that were passed down from when Adria was a baby). They provide her comfort as she sleeps. Because sometimes she is afraid of Monsters.

But it was a conversation about fear and monsters with Daddy, that ultimately resulted in her praying to ask Jesus in her heart a few months ago. She used to wake up yelling in the night, but it's very rare since she asked Jesus to be with her.

Yes, she is just now 5. I see a powerhouse in the making in Johanna. The future is hers to embrace. She walks her own unique path and goes after what she wants with a vengeance.

I try to remember this will serve her well in life, when it's driving me crazy at home :)  Thank you, Lord, for this precious, healthy little girl.

Thank you, Teachers

I just need to take a few minutes to say Thank You.

Many times throughout this year and last, I have been incredibly thankful for the kind, supportive teachers my daughters have at school. Teacher Appreciation Week gives me some extra motivation to share just how much they mean to me. (But of course, I got busy at work this week and am just a tad late sharing this.)

These teachers are creating an environment that's enabling our children to grow and excel. Both of our daughters attend the local public school, and we have been very pleased with the teachers and the administration. It's a new experience to us, as Adrian was always home-schooled and I only attended private, Christian schools along with being home-schooled for five years. We both received a good education, yet are thankful for great teachers who make public school a good option for our family.

ADRIA

As Adria nears the end of First Grade, I am so thrilled with her progress in learning. She is reading age appropriate books very well, requiring only occasional assistance with words, and her math comprehension is impressive. Just yesterday, we realized she forgot to do her homework, so she did her math problems on the way to school...it's only a 10 minute drive and 4 minutes down the road, she was finished! She has earned straight A's all year, receiving the Distinguished Honor Roll each quarter. Woohoo!!

Adria's recent First Grade Portrait, age 7 - photo by Lifetouch

And so much credit goes to her amazing teachers - both from Kindergarten and this year. Adria is in a classroom with two experienced teachers, and they have been wonderful. Mrs. Hastings just loves Adria's wit and often shares with me funny things she says or sweet things she does. She knows how to encourage her strengths and minimize her weaknesses.

Like that time on a class trip when they were playing relay games. Mrs. Hastings subtly made Adria's group two people fewer than the others...not so they could win, but so Adria's team could finish their relay around the same time as the others. Adria can't run as fast as other first graders, due to her spina bifida and leg braces, so it slowed her team down, but she gave her best and her team finished with the others!

Then there was the day I totally missed the Honor Roll Assembly. and Mrs. Hastings sent me pictures of Adria prancing across the stage. Adria was disappointed I didn't make it, but glad I could see her pose as she was recognized for her accomplishment.

Mrs. Hastings even sent me a note earlier in the year saying such kind things about Adria, like "Her intuitiveness about how others might be feeling is just awesome and her desire to make them feel good about themselves is just too much."

Adria's first grade class in December - Mrs. Clough on left and Mrs. Hastings on right in rear

And  of course Mrs. Clough who is Adria's walking buddy every day at noon when they go to the school nurse, Mrs. Lord, who helps Adria with her special potty needs. Mrs. Clough always seems to be in a good mood and attentive to each child's unique personality in the class. Adria missed her so much when she was on vacation recently.

JOHANNA

Johanna started pre-school in the fall knowing most her colors and some numbers, but really struggling with shapes and letters. Now, she's got her shapes down, easily counts to 20 and beyond when prompted, and recognizes many letters. She can spell her name and write with some help. And she colors inside the lines much better :) She loves Art and Dramatic play at pre-school.

Johanna's recent preschool portrait, age 4 - photo by Lifetouch

Her teachers are so full of energy and perfect for their job. They manage a room full of three and four year olds without ever seeming to lose patience and keep them entertained and learning. Even though Johanna is in a class full of 13 boys with just one other girl, her teachers make sure there are plenty of activities she enjoys and embraces with all her friends.

Johanna often talks about her teachers and how much fun she has at preschool. Just tonight she said, "Mom, I love Mrs. Mingo. And I love Mrs. Hill too!"  Her teacher's name is really Mrs. Mozingo, but it's kind of adorable how she calls her "Miss Mingo" most of the time.

Johanna's preschool class at a recent trip to the Fire Hall - Mrs. Mozingo on left and Mrs. Hill on the right
Note the 2 little girls and ALL the boys!

In addition to their teachers, I have been impressed with the school administration at the local public school. I don't know how many hundred pre-school through second grade students attend there, but it's a A LOT. The staff call the children by name when they see them in the halls, encouraging them and challenging them to have good behaviors.

I visit when possible for Adria's lunch time, assemblies, class trips and other special events. It seems to be such a good, positive environment. I know I don't seem all the day to day drama with the children and parents, but what I do see are caring professionals genuinely trying to prepare these young ones for success in school and life.

There are so many more people I could name, like Adria's art teacher, computer teacher, librarian, gym teachers, cafeteria workers and more. THANK YOU ALL!

We parents appreciate how you care for our children every day. 

My 29th Birthday

February 7, 2011

Bright lights surrounded me. Voices. Activity. Hustle.

The fog lifted as I began to regain consciousness and awareness that I was lying on a gurney in an Emergency Room. This time I was not there for my husband...it was for me.

Nurses were undressing me and started to ask questions.

"When is your birthday?"

"Today." I responded groggily. "It's my 29th birthday."

The nurses were surprised and sympathetic that I was spending my birthday evening in the ER.

I looked down at my brightly colored undergarments that were currently exposed and said, "At least I wore a cute bra today." Ha! Trying to see the positive in the moment...

It had been an interesting day and weeks leading up to my unexpected hospital visit.

That morning I had given a training presentation during our weekly sales meeting. We lived in Indianapolis at the time, and I sold new homes for a national builder. In fact, we had just moved into our own new home a few weeks before.

Near the end of our sales meeting, a surprise arrived. Someone brought in a large, beautiful bouquet of purple flowers...and they were for me! An incredible birthday gift from my husband. A few tears rolled down my cheeks at his thoughtfulness.

The beautiful birthday bouquet my husband had delivered to me at work!

The guy sitting next to me said, "Now that's the reaction we hope to get!"

I was genuinely very appreciative, plus I was already super hormonal. Just three weeks before I had endured a painful miscarriage. Even though I was just 10 weeks pregnant when it happened, there was a great deal of pain and blood involved.

The problem was, the bleeding had not stopped. It had lessened, but I was trying to be tough and just let my body heal on its own. But it was not.

After the sales meeting, I went back to my office in a model home that day and waited until my late afternoon OB appt.

Warning: This part gets kind of gross!

Time for my OB visit...Let's see. How do I put this delicately? Oh whatever, let's just be real and put it out there! Maybe this story can help another young mom avoid a similar ordeal.

I had developed a major blood clot as a result of remnants from my pregnancy. For weeks after I lost the baby, I had been bleeding pretty heavy. Once my OB removed the clot, it was like a disgusting dam burst. I laid there for 45 minutes and could not get up because of it. Yep, totally gross.

The somber nurse, ironically named "Sunshine", looked a bit horrified and said she'd never seen that much blood in their office. I began to feel extremely faint.

They called Adrian to come in and said they needed to take me to the hospital next door for surgery. I asked for some extra clothes - the business suite I had on was not working for me anymore!

I fainted right after Adrian arrived. Too much blood loss. I completely passed out on the floor as they were trying to get me ready to go to the hospital. Once I regained consciousness, they attempted to help me stand and walk out. No good. I was out again. (In case you don't know, I have fainted many times over the years when in pain.)

My husband and my OB had to CARRY me out to the car and drive to the hospital right next door, since it was faster than calling the ambulance.

So there I was lying in the Emergency Room on my birthday, getting prepped for D&C surgery. Guess our dinner plans would have to wait...

The procedure was completely painless. Well, they gave me anesthesia, and I was completely unconscious for the whole thing, so that makes sense. But literally, I never had any pain from it that night or the next. It was the simplest surgery, not sure why I was so worried about it before.

We were back home around midnight and still made it out to celebrate my birthday the next night.

But it was a day that would go down in my personal history book as my most memorable birthday! 

That was 5 years ago already, but it's all so clear, I can still smell the scent of a Five Guys cheeseburger on my anesthesiologist in the Operating Room before he made me black out. Ha!

Just two months later, I became pregnant with Johanna - her name means God is gracious.

I may have spent my 29th birthday in the ER with an emergency surgery following, but it was not a ruined birthday. After all, there was that surprise bouquet delivery from my husband! Take the good with the bad.

(And it's definitely easier to share this story 5 years later.)

A Look Back at 2015

As we start a new year, I always like to reflect on the highlights of the year past...the new experiences, changes, and lessons learned.

For 2015 there is one moment, one hour really, that stands out above all the rest. 

Meeting our son, Judah. 

Just after I delivered him, they gave him a quick wipe over and handed him to me. He was perfectly adorable and for the next hour he laid on my chest - skin to skin - in that special bonding time I had heard about but never experienced like this with my daughters. I didn't know how much he weighed or how long he was, but it didn't matter yet. He was in my arms.

Yep, that was definitely the highlight of my year! But there were many other moments to remember for each of us.

Our Family of 5 Photo - November 2015

Judah

Our baby boy joined the family in late April, now 8 months old. He has been a happy, healthy boy bringing great joy to everyone in our family. He's totally Daddy's boy...they hang out all day most days. His sisters adore him and are ridiculous with the smothering of kisses. He's mostly tolerant. And Mommy thinks he's the most handsome little guy in the universe!

He's becoming a hefty dude, weighing about 20 pounds now. In just the past two weeks, he's finally mastered sitting without toppling over and has been rolling, but just today he CRAWLED for the first time! And just this week, he pulled himself up to stand in his crib. He sleeps fairly well but still likes to wake me up through the night...Yawn! His two-tooth grin and big brown eyes will melt you.

My Two Handsome Men

Johanna

Ever the spice in our family, Johanna just turned four years old in December. She has as much energy and vitality as ever. Sometimes we love it, sometimes we....well, let's just say she can get into some messes. Judah is her biggest fan; he laughs at her dancing and jumping all the time. It's pretty hilarious!

After attending preschool 2 mornings a week earlier in the year, she started going to the same school as Adria this fall 4 mornings a week. She is just one of 2 girls in a class with 12 boys (yikes), but she holds her own fine and is making friends. Her best buddy is still a girl from church who is just one day younger. Her favorite things are playing "dress-ups", play-do, going to the beach and visiting people. I often hear her saying "You're the best sister ever!" when she and Adria are playing together, then a few minutes later they're arguing...Ha! Jo-Jo is so much fun and oozes personality.

Sweet and Spunky Johanna - 4 years old

Adria

Our oldest turned seven just a week after starting first grade this fall. She struggled the first couple weeks because she missed her Kindergarten friends and routine, and all the math and reading was "so must harder." But she has excelled, made new friends and loves her teachers (we do too!) It's been a joy listening to her improve as she reads.

A couple big events from her year were playing soccer in the spring and participating in the Little Miss Apple Scrapple Pageant in October. Then, she and Johanna both did a Kids Run in Pennsylvania where she met Deena Kastor, a famous marathon Olympian.

Her health has been good overall with the Peristeen bowel program allowing her to be mostly "diaper free" for the past year. She's had some accidents at school, but the nurse takes very good care of her. We are so thankful. And her big progress in her weekly physical therapy has been that she can now hop on one foot! Amazing!!! Her latest interest is in making cooking videos. Though she sometimes laments that she is different because of her need for leg braces and catheters, she does not let spina bifida hold her back. We are so proud of her!

Bubbly and friendly Adria - 7 years old

Daddy

Adrian's year has been an interesting one. He has excelled to a new level in the sport he loves - Disc Golf. He participated in many weekend tournaments, some affiliated with the Professional Disc Golf Association (PDGA), and even WON in his division a couple times last year! 

This sport and the camaraderie with other guys has provided a great outlet from his daily duties of full-time Dad. I am always amazed at what he accomplishes in and around our home, and how he often realizes the needs of our children better than I. Adrian also assisted family members with home improvement projects, including flying down to Texas to visit his sister Angie and install flooring in her newly purchase home last fall.

Unfortunately, in 2015 Daddy's seizures returned with dramatic flare during vacation. It was craziness and upsetting, but it brought us to a new place of trying to be better prepared and more accepting of this bizarre condition we have battled for the last six years. That's right, Dec. 26 was the six year anniversary of his first seizure...it's now been a battle for half of our 12 years of marriage. We have great days and down-right terrible days, but you know, we always get up again.

Mommy

Aside from the amazing gift of carrying and delivering a child, I had some other big events this year. Work has been very busy, and I'm so thankful for that. It was a strong year for new home sales with the local Builder where I've now been for 2.5 years. Our company won a few big local awards, including being voted Best Southern Delaware Home Builder by a regional magazine! I got my 15 seconds of fame with some air time in our TV commercial, and the outlook for 2016 is good. 

From a fitness perspective, I had big ambitions to run a half marathon in October - but my body was not quite ready for that. Instead, I ran a 10K (6.2 miles) race at the Runner's World festival in Bethlehem, PA and had a great time doing it. I really love running events, but man is it hard to make time to run with 3 little ones in the house!

Our Family

We did not take a big week-long vacation in 2015, but we enjoyed several family excursions:

• The Pocono Mountains, PA in February (a trip with my company) - the girls love hotels with indoor pools and Snow
• The Shenandoah Valley, VA in June where we camped in KOA cabin - but this was the trip where Daddy had a seizure
• Dutch Wonderland in Lancaster, PA - it was a hot summer day for our first visit with the kids to this family-fun amusement park, but baby Judah was not too impressed
• Runner's World event in October in Bethlehem, PA - we girls successfully ran races, then I took the children to the Crayola museum while Daddy went disc golfing
• Christmas Lights at Longwood Gardens in December - a day trip with Granny and Grandad for one of the best light displays on the east coast

It was a year filled with great blessings yet sprinkled with challenging moments. We are ever thankful for our family and the opportunity to continue on this journey together!

Hoping you and yours have a blessed 2016.

First Week of First Grade

Adria made it through her first week of First Grade. I say "made it" because it's been a bit of an emotional week for her. At times she's been dancing with excitement and other times teary-eyed and fussy. There are many changes with First Grade, and our routine oriented little girl can struggle to adjust.

A couple weeks ago she kept saying how she missed Kindergarten and wasn't ready for First Grade. She was mostly concerned that she would miss all her friends and not know anyone. I reassured her that she would see many familiar faces, and in fact she's sitting beside one of her best buddies since pre-school in her class.

Adria at her desk during Wednesday's 1st and 2nd grade open house

It was easier for me this year because I knew more what to expect and that we had a plan for Adria's unique spina bifida related needs that would work. Last year, we really had to plan ahead with her teachers and the nurse to Prepare for Kindergarten.

First Day Drama

Despite her earlier fears, when it came time for her first day of school on Monday, August 31 this girl was ready! In fact, she did not even want Mommy to walk into school with her. She said, "I'm in first grade, so I know everything!"

First day of first grade

Well excuse me for trying to be a helpful mother on your first day :)  We got this little attitude in check, and I followed her to the cafeteria where we met up with her class and all the other first graders before walking back to her classroom.

Cafeteria full of first graders

She smiled happily and waved goodbye, ready for her new adventure. I knew she would be fine.

Adria waves goodbye with her classmates on Monday

That is, until we got a surprise call in the afternoon from the school nurse saying that Adria had 3 stinky accidents on her first day of school! She had to change her panties twice and then her entire outfit. I was so surprised and upset to hear this! Adria has not had bad accidents like that since we started her on the Peristeen program in December. I felt so bad she had to deal with that on her First Day of First Grade :(

In talking with the nurse, we determined looser bowels can be a side effect from the antibiotic (amoxicillin) that she is currently taking. Last week, Adria was diagnosed with strep throat (ugh!) before school started and has to take the medicine for 10 days.

That said, Adria did not seem bothered by the accidents and later just said she couldn't believe she had to change 3 times that day. Her biggest complaint is that I sent her to school in pull-ups the rest of the week to avoid this happening again while she's on the antibiotic. Wearing panties is a big deal for her...check out Panties are Priceless.

First Grade is Different

Adria does like school and has mostly enjoyed going back. But the "demands" of First Grade have been taxing on her this week, though I think she only shows it at home.

It's just different from her glorious Kindergarten days :)

• New Classroom - One of the biggest differences is that Adria's new classroom is pretty much in the furthest corner of the school building. On one hand this provides her with great exercise to help build up her walking stamina, on the other hand the longer distances to the cafeteria, gym, etc. can be very tiring for her.
• Later Lunchtime - The school food program is great and provides free breakfast and lunch for students. However, her lunch time is 40 minutes later than it was last year and our food-loving girl complains that it's such a "long time to wait for lunch." But really, lunch is at 12:10 p.m. and her teachers try to give them a mid-morning snack. She'll be fine.
• New Teachers - Once again this year, Adria is in a classroom with two teachers. We requested that since we loved how well it worked last year. Her teachers are great and have been teaching at the school many years, and they already seem very impressed by Adria's abilities and confidence. Our girlie really bonded with her teachers last year, and I'm sure she will again this year.
• More Reading and Writing - This will be the case every year, and she'll have to get used to it. We tried to keep her reading and writing over the summer, but I could have invested more time into encouraging her to write. She complains that her hand hurts from all the "coloring and writing." Haha! It's good for her.
• New Friends - There are some familiar faces in her class and many new faces. I have no doubt that she'll be happily hugging all her classmates before too long. She's still a very social gal and when I walk through the school halls with her, many people say, "Hi Adria!"
• New Potty Routine - This year, she is still going to the nurse's office before lunch every day to empty her bladder with a catheter. However, last year she laid on a bed while the nurse took care of everything. Now, she sits on the potty and is more involved in helping with the process, which is great! We've been doing this all summer, but still she wanted to go back to how it was done last year at school. 

One more difference, is that her little sister Johanna will get dropped off at school with her 4 days a week for morning pre-school. Both the girls are very excited about this! 

Mommy and her girls in uniform.
Johanna doesn't have to wear one but she wanted to be like sissy.

Johanna's first day was on Wednesday and apparently just her first two days wore her out good. She was asleep by the time I got home from work last night around 7:20 (it was a late night for me...), only waking up briefly to go potty then sleep all night. 

Don't be fooled by the shy face, she was super excited!

Johanna posing by her cubby at the pre-school open house Tuesday night.

It was a very busy week for us with first days of school and school open houses on different nights for the girls. We're all pretty exhausted and thankful that it was a short school week. Now, the girls have four days off, but I'll be working all weekend. At least I'll have off Monday for Labor Day!

There will be lots of changes and adjustments for us all this school year, and many of them good. Daddy is really enjoying more one-on-one time with his baby boy while the girls are at school. We are also appreciating the great support from both of our Moms, who are scheduled to pick up and help care for the girls several days a week. Grandparents close by is great!

Daddy and his little man

Here's to wishing you and your family a great 2015-2016 school year!

Third Time Around

Expected one month from today...a newborn baby boy! My baby. Our baby. God's child. For the third time, we are anticipating the arrival of a miraculous new life. What a blessing and privilege this is, and we do not take it for granted.

As we look forward to the arrival of what looks to be our first son, I find myself amused as I compare what it's like to be expecting a third child versus number one and number two. I would say the love a mother feels in her heart for the baby she carries does not lessen, but her emotions and planning for the baby certainly do change with each one.

Our first two babies greeting the Easter Bunny during Friday's Kite Festival near the beach.

Reading about Baby

With our first child, Adria, I was so excited about having a baby and all the mystery and newness that surrounded creating life. Even though I had the experience of my sister's stories with the two young children she had, it was an all new endeavor of learning and preparing for my baby. I immersed myself into reading What to Expect When You're Expecting and read that cover to cover, along with a couple other pregnancy books. (If you really know me, you'd know that it generally takes me a loooong time to get through a book, if I finish it at all, so it's impressive that I showed such dedication).

I will admit that it became much harder to read the books about what to expect from our newborn, after five months along when we found out that Adria had spina bifida. Suddenly, they did not seem as helpful or pertinent, yet I continued with an adjusted focus on reading about what to expect with spina bifida. That got overwhelming pretty quickly, and I returned to the generic baby books.

When our second daughter, Johanna, was on the way almost three years later, I wasn't even sure where those baby books were. We had moved twice since Adria's birth, so they were hidden somewhere in the shuffle. I did eventually find a couple, and review a few pages but now that I had a toddler to care for who was just learning to walk, there wasn't nearly as much time for reading.

This third time, those books are long gone. We've moved twice (again) since Johanna. And those books were given to other expectant mothers over the past three years. Now, I just downloaded a pregnancy app on my iPhone to help me keep track of how far along I am...otherwise I'd have no idea. But we are getting, so close it's easy to remember!

Naming Baby

I was not that girl who had baby names picked out for my children by the time I was age 10...or 20. Naming our babies has been tough! Still, we were pretty set on Adria's name a few months before she was born. Her name, of course, is the female form of her Daddy's name, and she shares his initials. She had his heart, right from the start ;)

When it came time to name baby 2 and we knew she was a girl, we decided to do a name similar to Mommy's name and use my initials. Johanna means "Gift from God" and we truly felt that, as she came to us soon after we had experienced a miscarriage.

We love the opportunity to pick out a boy name this third time around, but it has not been easy either. We are 90% sure on his name at this point, but....you'll have to wait until he's born to find that out! As we did with the girls' names, we'll keep this a surprise until he arrives. It's a good way to keep outside opinions to a minimum ;)

Do you like our fun T-shirts? Mine is new, but Adrian has been able to wear "The Impregnator" shirt for all three babies ;)

Boby Stuff

In truth, I feel very fortunate when it comes to pregnancy. Having wide hips and a long torso ends up being a pretty good combination for baby carrying! That said, there are some obvious differences this third time around. My biggest pregnancy issues with the girls were the obnoxious burping and gas along with ditsy pregnancy brain...you know what I mean.

But this little guy...For starters, I weigh more now than I ever did with either of the girls, and I still have a month to go! I've said it before, and I'll say it again - I want to eat all the time. My friends with boys claim it was this way for them too. My belly is definitely protruding more than it did with the girls. And the heartburn has been awful and regular. I so do not remember that. Plus, I got bad winter colds that lasted for weeks on end, leaving my stomach in agony to the point of tears from all the coughing. Sometimes I feared it would never stop. And now a cold is starting to return...I am not happy about this.

But all that said, I feel very good in general and am perfectly content for baby to wait until his due date of May 4 to arrive. I've got lots still to do at home and work to prepare!

Momma's belly is looking pretty large now with a month to go!

Birth Plan

I laugh when I read on-line guides to "creating your birth plan" because in my experience and so many others, nothing goes as planned when it's time to deliver your baby.

Adria was scheduled to be delivered via C-section on Sept. 2 to lessen the risk of damaging her spina bifida sack. However, a test showed that her lungs were not quite ready for delivery so we played a waiting game for a week, and I ultimately delivered her via C-section on Sept. 8 with a doctor I had never met. 

With Johanna, my plan was attempt a more tradition delivery, also know as VBAC (Vaginal Birth After C-section). Since I had never gone into labor or experienced this with Adria, I worked with a doula  recommended by a friend to provide me with advice and planning. Ultimately, my water broke in Walmart (read more on that incident HERE) and I had to go straight to the hospital and be put on monitors. I had a very supportive OB in Indianapolis, and I was still able to deliver vaginally but it was almost 16 hours later. They had to give me Pitocin to keep my labor progressing, and when they did that I asked for the epidural. I have to admit, I am a fan of the epidural...it has drawbacks but it enabled me to "rest" during those later hours of labor and then focus during the 45 minutes of pushing it took to deliver Jo-Jo.

This third time, I've had to adjust my plans as our local hospital in southern Delaware does not generally perform VBAC deliveries, even though I am a good candidate for another one. Halfway through pregnancy, I changed to a new OB office and plan to deliver at the Dover hospital. It was actually a tough decision (Read more at WHERE SHOULD I DELIVER MY BABY). Honestly, my biggest plan this time is to make sure I pack a bag for the hospital soon, so that Adrian doesn't have to flounder and figure out what I need like last time. Then, I'll hope and pray for a safe and fairly short labor and delivery with a healthy baby at the end.... and I'll probably get that epidural again. Not ashamed.

Post Baby Awareness 

One of the biggest differences this third time is the awareness of what comes AFTER the baby arrives. As much as I'm looking forward to cuddling and snuggling with a little bundle of sweetness, I also know what is coming. I remember all the baby fussiness and lack of sleep, particularly in the first few weeks. Then, there's all the mommy "discharge" and body aches and pains after delivery. A friend recently asked me if was easier to recover from the C-section or vaginal birth. In truth, they were both so different that it's hard to say, but if I had to pick one...I'd say the vaginal birth was a tougher recovery.

Of course, my situation was unique, as I had more time to recover with Adria. For three days after her birth, I laid in a hospital room without her as she was 20 minutes away in a children's hospital recovering from her back closure surgery...It was terrible to be apart from my newborn baby. But it did give me the chance to rest and rebuild strength for the next two weeks we would spend with her in the NICU. 

Our experience with Johanna was much different. She arrived at 4:44 a.m. on a Friday, and we headed home on Saturday night. In theory, that's great. In reality, it was actually somewhat harder to be at home that first week than in the NICU because we did not have the support of all those doctors and nurses 24/7. 

And let's not forget the milk coming in and figuring how to get this baby to latch onto Mommy and drink. I think many young moms are not prepared for the initial challenge of breast-feeding and the pain involved. But my advice is to hang in there if you can and keep trying! It will get better, and if it doesn't work for you and baby, don't feel guilty.

Final Thoughts

There's so much more I could say about the differences this third time around, but at the end of the day, it is true that this baby will get less of my attention than the first. There's no way around it. I have two inquisitive little girls that will continue to demand my time as well. And I know, it's going to get really tough to balance all their needs, but this Baby is what we wanted and prayed for. He is already deeply loved by everyone in our family, and we look forward to meeting him in about a month!

Oh yeah, and we worked on getting the nursery ready today, so I'm feeling more prepared :)

Where should I deliver my Baby?

For the last few months, I have been asking this question...Where should I deliver my Baby?

One might think that by the third time around I would be a pro and have fundamental questions like this answered very early in my pregnancy.

Yet here I am, six months pregnant with the arrival of our little boy just a couple months away and still pondering this question. Alas, I think we have finally decided on a plan...But as any mother knows, one's best laid plans for baby's delivery can (and usually do) turn out drastically different.

Mommy at 23 weeks pregnant and two little princesses at my side.
photo taken about 2 weeks ago

First Pregnancy

I remember asking this question with my first pregnancy. Would it just be best to deliver at our local, southern Delaware hospital? What exactly is a birthing center? Should I consider that? My mom delivered me at home...was that an option I liked? And ultimately, which option was best for my baby and I?

In the end, the decision on WHERE was made for us. Almost without option. After my 20 week ultrasound with Adria and the earth-shaking revelation (at least in our little world!) that she had a serious malformation called spina bifida, we were quickly told where we needed to go. Only one hospital in Delaware had the technology and specialist to give her the unique care she would need - Christiana Care Hospital in Newark, which was 90 minutes away.

Secondly, my choice on HOW to deliver was taken away. Because my baby's spina bifida was severe enough that she had a "sack" in which her spinal cord literally protruded from her lower back, a vaginal birth would likely cause further damage to her spinal cord. It was highly advised that I plan to deliver via Cesarean Section.

And that's what I did. In the afternoon of September 8, 2008 Adria was delivered by C-section at Christiana Hospital...with my husband and a host of a dozen or so doctors, residents, and nurses around us. This was a week later than my original scheduled c-section (read more about that HERE) but all went as well as we could hope. The very next day Adria had surgery to put her spinal cord back in place and close the opening on her back.

Adria enters the world!

Second Pregnancy

Two years later, after a major move to an apartment in Indianapolis, a positive pregnancy test and bloodwork showed our second baby was on the way! Through a friend's recommendation, I found a great OB/GYN in this new state and had great confidence in his ability. I went into my 10 week OB visit expecting to discuss more about my options for where to deliver in the area. Instead, I got the news that my pregnancy did not appear to be progressing as it should...tears. A week later, I found myself in agonizing pain with heavy bleeding and knew what was happening. I lost our baby in January 2011, the same week we moved into our new home in Indiana.

Unfortunately, that was not the end of the miscarriage. Two weeks later a dramatic incident occurred during a follow-up visit to my OB. Suffice it to say, the bleeding would not stop! Next thing I knew, I had fainted and was being carried out to the car by my husband and OB, then taken to the ER at the hospital next door.

On February 7...my 29th birthday...I had an emergency D&C (dilation and curettage) surgery at Community Hospital South to remove all trace of my pregnancy.

Third Pregnancy

Despite all the drama, we still wanted another baby and became pregnant again soon after the miscarriage. My pregnancy history was now more complicated with a c-section, special needs child, and a miscarriage on my record... And the question resurfaced, Where should I deliver my Baby?

My OB was very supportive when I asked him about the option of delivering this baby as a VBAC (Vaginal Birth After C-section). Call me crazy, but I really wanted the chance to go into labor and push a baby out like a "normal mom." My c-section had healed well and baby Johanna appeared to be growing perfectly healthy inside of me.

My OB was a sole practice who actually delivered babies at two different hospitals that were both within 15 minutes of our Indiana home. We selected the one we really liked, which was the same hospital where I had surgery earlier that year. That is NOT the hospital where Johanna was born.

Just after noon on December 1, 2011 my water broke while I was walking through Wal-Mart with my Mom and Adria...that was lovely. I went to the hospital and had monitors put on my belly, which is necessary when doing VBAC delivery. However, my OB had asked that I go to my second choice hospital since he already had a mother laboring there and we would likely be delivering around the same time. In other words...if I went to the hospital I really wanted, he might not make it there in time to deliver my baby and another doctor would need to step in.

I followed his advice and many hours of labor plus 45 minutes of pushing later, I successfully delivered Johanna via VBAC around 4 a.m. on December 2 at St. Francis Hospital in Indianapolis.

Johanna enters the world, much to her sister's delight!

Fourth Pregnancy

Now, I find myself back in Delaware another three years later asking the question...Where should I deliver my Baby?

None of the hospitals where I delivered are really options. My birth history is further complicated with this fourth pregnancy having now had a VBAC and wanting to try that again. Some moms think I'm crazy, since a C-section seems "easier"...schedule a date, no painful labor, surgery performed and presto, there's your baby! However, it's not quite that easy and the healing process is rough and can take longer, plus I'd rather not be cut open again if I don't have to. Sorry to be so blunt!

BUT, in "slower, lower" Delaware a VBAC is not an easy option...apparently...even if you've already had one successfully. There are two hospitals in rural Sussex county, but neither offers a 24 hour anesthesiologist and OR staff or a NICU - all preferred when attempting a VBAC delivery.

My local OB was open to allowing me to try a VBAC delivery at Nanticoke Hospital, but he had to advise me that is was not "recommended" at a hospital without those services. It's just 15 minutes from home, my brothers were born there many years ago, and many of my friends have delivered there. However, it seems like it's not going to be the best option for my baby and me.

This week, I finally made the decision to transfer my prenatal care to a new team of doctors in Kent County and make plans to deliver our baby at Bayhealth - Kent General Hospital in Dover, about 45 minutes from home. They offer the full spectrum of services that are advised for Moms with a more "interesting" birth history like mine.

You'll have to stay tuned to see how these plans all pan out a few months from now and what the story around this baby will be! Praying for a smooth and fairly uneventful delivery this time.


P.S. If you're pregnant for the first time, don't let my story worry you too much, all this is not typical. That said, do not be surprised if your "birth plan" goes much different than planned!

P.S.S. If you ever feel like sharing your birth stories, I love to hear them! Maybe it's because we connect as we relive the wild blend of joy and misery than can accompany bringing a new life into the world...