Belly Kisses

Every Morning. Every Night. My growing belly gets hugs and kisses from a little girl who is beyond excited about her baby brother coming!

Adria's excitement over this baby has brought added fun to my pregnancy. It's evident that she remembers being three years old and seeing Mommy pregnant with little sister Johanna. She knows exactly what is coming...Mommy's belly keeps getting "huger" and then amazingly one day I come home from the hospital with a baby. (Since giving birth is just that simple...)

Johanna is catching on to the excitement too, but at three years old, she does not have the same awareness or experience as her six year old big sister.

Adria is getting impatient to meet our Baby. I on the other hand, am feeling good and in no rush, as there's still much preparation to do before that day comes and I want baby to stay content to keep on growing. At 26 weeks along, I am just about three months away from baby's May 4 due date.

My recent OB appointment (at a new doctor's office...see THIS POST) showed that my belly is measuring just right and Baby's heartbeat sounds good. Yeah!!! And...I've gained more than 20 pounds so far.

It's not "water" weight. I seriously want to EAT...constantly. Some say that boys make mommy's more hungry. I guess so! Man, I could really go for one of those giant Farmer's breakfasts right now. You know, with the eggs, bacon, toast, home fries, pancakes, fruit cup and a big glass of chocolate milk. Yummmmm.

I digress. Back to Adria and her infatuation with my belly. She seriously must give "baby brother" a hug and kiss every morning before she leaves for school, and then as an added part of our bedtime routine every night. We say prayers with Daddy, Mommy reads the girls a story in bed, we sing a song, then I give them both hugs and kisses. Now, after my kiss I have to stand and lean in so Adria can pat and kiss my belly. This must happen every night!

It's pretty adorable. Until she tries to lift my shirt and do it out in public. She sometimes spazzes with excitement and repeatedly showers kisses all over my belly. Some think it's cute, others give us a strange look. Either way, I'm glad she's so excited and so in love with Baby already!

Just over a week ago, we visited a friend who has a two month old baby boy.
Adria delighted in holding him and playing with other babies who were there for a birthday party.
Someone even said of this photo, "It's so precious how much this girly LOVES babies!"
(FYI - that's not the baby's mother shown in the picture, though she does have a girl and boy) 

Adria tells me that when Baby comes and she hears him crying in the night, she'll get up and change his diaper for me... That's a nice thought. Not really possible, but I appreciate it.

Last night, after reading our story I chatted with her a little longer. I had an extremely busy day at work starting with an early staff meeting followed by good but long sales appointments with three different couples. By the time I got home at 7:30 pm, I was exhausted but wanted at least a few quality minutes with my girl. (Johanna had already fallen asleep after a fun day at Gramma's house.)

While lying there with the girls, I felt the Baby moving around and had Adria put her hand on my belly. She soon exclaimed her delight over feeling him kick. He was quite active and saying hello to his sister. She loved it! Such a precious moment. 

Then she says to me..."Mom, I was your first baby, right? I don't remember being inside your belly. I'm trying to think what it looked like. I think it was Red."

Adria paused, then leaned over and whispered, "You know...like Blood."

Where did that come from? Who knows. But this girls is hilarious in how literal she can be and her view of things.

She really made me laugh about a month ago when she was suggesting names for Baby. We are still undecided on a name but are tossing around ideas. Adria decided she had some good ones to add to the mix...Here are a few of her possible names for Baby Brother:

• Olaf Summer Seely
• Star Pumpkin Seely
• Sweetie Pie Seely
• Jingle Bell Cupcake Seely
• Jacob Rug Seely

Charming ideas...I doubt any will make it on the Birth Certificate but I like her creativity! Daddy and I will need to keep deliberating over this.

But don't expect to hear any news of Baby's name until he arrives. We always like to keep it a surprise until our babies are born!

Well, I hear little groans and stirrings coming from the girl's bedroom. Time to make my belly available for some morning kisses!

An Emotional Ride

What is it about us, women? That we desire, even crave an emotional experience. To feel. To cry. To struggle to breath as our heart pounds within us. Emotion. So untrustworthy yet somehow fulfilling.

And in the day to day as we muddle through the mundane, the repetition, the constant giving of ourselves...the feelings can lie dormant. They are neatly tucked away where they can't cause trouble or disturbance in our bubble of existence.

But once in a while we allow ourselves to indulge in a fictional experience that produces real and raw emotions in us. A book that takes us to another place, time and life. A movie that transports us into another's secretly beautiful and agonizing life. A song that causes us to stop all and just listen.

They are very personal experiences. Most that we don't breathe about to anyone because those moments, those feelings are ours alone. And for some reason there is a sacredness in them. An escape from our reality...that in spite of all the blessings we have...still occasionally begs for an escape.

And so I find myself alone on my couch at midnight with shirt sleeves dampened and covered in dark smudges of mascara at the close of a movie called The Fault in Our Stars. It is one that my husband had no interest in watching, because he has absolutely no desire to indulge a wild emotional roller coaster ride for "entertainment." Life has enough real heartache and pain of its own, he says, why choose to engage in someone else's painful, fictional journey? It's a point to consider, and I can't fully say why we women often like it.

Maybe it's because even every fictional story has an element of truth, a snippet from someone's real life experience. By indulging and engaging our emotions, may we be better able to connect with others around us and their unique journey? We are created with emotions for a reason. It is healthy to feel them, understand them, and on occasion let them go for a ride just for the heck of it.

It is also healthy to control them, conceal them at appropriate times, and not rely on them to guide your life decisions.

As I sit here ready and needing to go to bed after two late nights in a row. I remember last night's emotions, primarily of joy and laughter, as I sat at kitchen table with several other women talking late into the night. For most of us, it was a rare late night out with no children or husband and we took full advantage...talking about anything and...everything! (No worries ladies, I won't tell)

I really should not have stayed out until 2 a.m. That's almost irresponsible. But we indulged in the beauty of real, face to face conversation and emotions that are more true than what a book or movie can produce.

So here's to the ride. The crazy, emotional ride of life. May we hang on tight through every high and low, and not be afraid to feel the wind in our hair.

A Day in the Life of Our Girls

Yesterday, Adrian and I returned from a glorious four day trip to Virginia Beach in celebration of our ten year anniversary on Friday. Just the two of us spent our days waking up to the sound of the ocean waves, exploring the aquarium, playing disc golf, eating amazing food, getting some freebies after enduring a timeshare presentation, and taking a horseback ride along the beach. It was definitely one of our best getaways as a couple. You can view photos here in case you missed them on the facebook page.


One of my favorite photos from our trip, a horseride on the beach on our anniversary.

But this wonderful time alone would not have been possible without our moms. We are so blessed to have them and greatly appreciate their willingness to care for our daughters. We love our girls deeply, but they do require much each and every day. Many parents of children with special needs never get a break from their daily routines because it is hard to find people willing and able to do what is necessary to care for their child.

Both of our moms (and Ade's sisters) have been supportive and learned what is necessary to keep our girls for an overnight. Adria is five and Johanna is now almost two, and their daily schedule is ever changing with Adria's regular medicine adjustments. My mom kept the girls for the first two days at our house, so Adria could still take the bus to pre-school, and Adrian's mom kept them the last two days at her home in the country.

To make things as "easy" as possible on our mothers, I typed up this schedule of what to expect and what needed to be done for our girls every day. Even thought they know most of this, I bolded all of the medicines just to make sure they stood out.

Girls’ Daily Schedule:

6:30-7:00          Johanna wakes up with a FULL diaper. Best to greet with
                            an 8 oz bottle of milk ;)

7:30                Adria wakes up. Often needs to be catheterized right away (if she did not already wake you at 4 or 5 a.m. with “ouchies”). Give her a cup of milk with heaping spoon of Ovaltine and just shy of a tsp. of Myralex.

8:00                Breakfast time. Pop-tarts, scrambled egg sandwich, and cereal are favorites. New medicine Macrodantin is a capsule. Pull apart and mix with a little applesauce for Adria. Also give her ½ tsp Oxybutanin.

8:30                Get girls dressed and braces on Adria. They usually watch an hour of TV in morning. Sophia on Disney Jr is a favorite.

9:30                Play time, outside if it’s nice. Give them each a cup of ½ apple juice and ½ water.

10:45             Get Adria ready for school. Make sure she’s finished her juice. Give her ½ tsp Senna syrup. Catheterize her.

11:00            Watch for her Bus, it usually comes around 11:20.

12:00            Johanna’s lunch time. Favorite is hard-boiled egg no yolk, cheese, and fruit.

1:30               Jo’s naptime. She still likes her milk before and her lullabies playing. She might talk for a while before falling asleep. You get some rest too.

3:10               Watch for Adria’s bus to return. Her school goes from 12:30-3:00. Wash up then snack and drink. Sometimes a little nap or iPad time.

4:30               Jo awake, never know how long she will sleep… Catheterize Adria. Go outside if nice.

6:00               Dinner time. Whatever you want to make, try to get some veggies in them.

7:00-7:30      Begin night-time routine. Get flush ready with 10 mL of saline in the syringe. Cath Adria and leave cath in. Put flush in end of cath, leave liquid in and pull out.

Insert Enemeez into her bottom and squeeze liquid out. Try to let it sit for a few minutes then sit her on potty for about 15-20 min with iPad.  (Adria does not have bowel or bladder control, read the post "It's a Stinky Situation" to learn more.)

Give her night meds ½ tsp Oxybutanin and ½ tsp of Cystex.

Wash up girls. Brush teeth. Put on pajamas. Give Jo a bottle of milk.

8:30             Say the Lord’s Prayer, read a story, sing a song. Bed time!

10:30          Hopefully everyone is fast asleep for the whole night thru J

Then do it again…

 

Mom sent me this photo of the girls having fun while mommy and daddy were away. They only missed us a little :)

And that's the brief version of a Day in the Life of our Girls. Of course for us, I'm usually taking care of most things that happen before 9 a.m. and after 5 p.m. Daddy is with them all day in between. They keep our lives full and we cherish these early years with them, but it really was wonderful to get some time away from the every day.

When will I go in the sky, Mommy?

Every night at the end of our routine, I snuggle into Adria's bed with both the girls and we read a story or two.

Tonight Johanna pulled a story off the bookshelf titled The First Easter. I don't think we've read the book since Easter, but it tells the story of Jesus' life and miracles, death on the cross, and His resurrection and ascension with colorful cartoons and child-friendly language.

The last page showed a picture of Jesus high in the clouds waving to the disciples as He ascended into heaven.

Adria seemed to ponder the page, then said, "How did Jesus get up there?"

Hmm, how best do I answer this? I replied, "His Father is God. He is able to do anything, and He lifted him up in the sky."

"I want to go up with Jesus in the sky," my insightful 5 year old responds.

"You will go with Jesus, honey. Everyone who loves Jesus will live with Him in heaven," I said, embracing this opportunity to share the most important thing she'll ever learn.

"When will I go in the sky, Mommy?" she says.

"Oh, mommy hopes that it's not for a long, long time. We go in the sky when we die." I said, maybe getting too deep but not wanting her to be in a hurry to go in the sky!

"But I want to go up like Jesus. I promise I'll come back," and there my little Adria brought a big smile to my face. I love the innocent mind of a child. She just wants to float through the clouds like Jesus, that sounds fun to me too!

On the one hand, I found her insistence to want to go in the sky slightly unnerving. On the other hand, I thoroughly enjoyed our little theological conversation and the chance to talk about Jesus.

Of course, Johanna was in the middle of it all shoving another book in our faces to be read! I just love these two.

These quiet moments and unplanned discussions with our children are so crucial to the foundation of their worldview as they grow. I fear that I have already missed many of these moments in my rush to get to the next thing, but I was thankful for our time tonight.

Johanna leading big sister through our backyard this morning. It usually goes that way with them ;)

 

Our special routine, the same every night

As a mother who works full-time, the evenings with my girls are extra special.
That's when we color, bake, paint our finger nails, play pretend, take a walk, or grocery shop.

And now, I get more time with them than I ever have. For the past 6 years, I have worked out of a model home from 10 a.m. to 6 p.m. on most days. Though these are not bad hours, I worked most weekends and depending on where the new home community was located, I did not get home until close to 7 p.m. That did not leave much evening time with the girls, but I still tried to make the most of it.

Since I started my new job three months ago, I now work a glorious 9 to 5 shift plus later for some appointments. Yes, I still work many weekends, but it's great to be home by 5:15 p.m. since I live VERY close to my current model home.

I am able to make dinner more often, instead of take-out (good thing, since there aren't many options around here!) and have appreciated the extra time with my family.

Tonight, the girls and I watched a cartoon together and danced during the final credits music, as has become our after-movie tradition!

After playtime, we begin our hour-long nightly routine. It goes something like this:

• Remove Adria's shoes, leg braces, and socks.
• Catheterize Adria and flush out bladder. Insert mini Enemeez.
• Sit Adria on potty for about 20 min. She usually plays games on my iPhone to occupy.
• Wash up Johanna (bath time every other night), change diaper and put on her pajamas.
• Make Jo an 8 oz. bottle of milk and put her in Daddy's lap with her favorite fuzzy green blanket.
• Give Adria her two evening meds - 1/2 tsp of Oxybutanin (bladder relaxant) and 1 tsp of Sulfamethoxazole (antibiotic to help prevent UTIs).
• Put on Adria's diaper, wash face and brush teeth then put on the PJs.
• Lie Adria in her bed, Johanna joins us but spends most the time crawling all over, in and out of the bed and stepping on sister's hair.
• Say the Lord's Prayer with Daddy.
• Read Adria a story, usually from the Highlight's High Five magazine, which arrive monthly. Thanks Grandma!
• Sing a lullaby. Most nights she asks for her favorite "Hush Little Baby." Mommy is tired of singing it over and over, but she loves it.
• Kisses to Adria. Lights out. But it's not over yet.
• Bring Johanna in her room and sit together in rocking chair, while lullabies play in the background.
• Read her one or two toddler books.
• Lights out. Rock a few minutes more. Enjoy the sweet smell of her hair or try to contain her if she's in wiggly mode.
• Kisses to Johanna and into the crib she goes. Night, night. She's just started responding with her own "night-night, ma". So cute!
• Crash on couch after some minor tidying and relax with my man.

Most nights I love this routine, some nights it seems to go on forever. But it works for us and gives me precious quality time with each of my loves.

Here's a video of Adria and I singing her favorite lullaby.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7F89SW-H9G8