Our 2018 Highlight Reel

No Christmas cards were mailed out from the Seely home this year. I usually send out over 100 cards with our smiling faces on them, but it just didn’t happen. And truthfully, I have no regrets. But sorry if you missed getting one.

Our Family at the Spina Bifida Assoc. Christmas Party

Instead, I’ll spend a few minutes spewing out some thoughts about our year, if you care to know how 2018 panned out in this house.

We started off the year with the girls trying something new and both taking a gymnastics class, which they really enjoyed. This fall Johanna went back to gymnastics, but Adria really wanted to take a martial arts class so she’s trying that out…and looks totally adorable in her white uniform.

Adria turned 10 in September! And just like that, we are officially parents to a child in the double digits. She continues to amaze us with her hard work, determination and spirit. She is a straight A student in her 4^th grade class, and this year was accepted into the Gifted and Talented Program at her school. And let me tell you, they have some seriously challenging assignments in that class, but it’s given her the opportunity to stretch herself and I see a budding writer in her. #proudmama

Adria in her martial arts outfit

Just a couple weeks ago, we had the opportunity to become part of the Spina Bifida Association of the Eastern Shore (Maryland) and participate in their annual Christmas party. What a wonderful experience for Adria to meet so many others, including several girls her age, who were also born with Spina Bifida. They enjoyed crafts, food and gifts from Santa while the parents feasted on a delicious meal. Adria keeps asking when we can get together with them again J

Johanna recently celebrated her 7^th birthday with a few of her “Besties”. Our spunky, fun and sensitive little girl makes friends wherever she goes with her bubbly personality. We’ve enjoyed watching her grow and learn to read in first grade, where she also earned straight A’s the first marking period. So thankful for wonderful teachers at the local public school! The girls are both riding the bus to and from school for the first time this year, so that’s been helpful in getting them to school on time (cough) and mommy getting to work early more often.

Judah is ready for Christmas!

Judah is growing fast and this 3 year old spends much of his time playing with trains, trucks, dirt, water, and balls. Total boy and Daddy loves it. They continue to have a special bond, spending their days together while the girls are away. Judah does go to preschool in Milford two days a week in a class with six boys and a girl. He loves his big sisters, especially messing with them while they're playing or coloring.

Adrian celebrated a milestone birthday, turning 40 in November. His birthday wish was to have all his siblings in town together, and it came true! They came from British Columbia, Texas, Ohio and locally so the 7 of them ate dinner together at his parent’s table for the first time in 11 years. So special!

In November, Adrian turned 40 and we
celebrated 15 years of marriage.

Another big milestone came on Thanksgiving Day, which was also our 15^th Wedding Anniversary. We actually celebrated it in October when we took a week-long trip to Maui, Hawaii (without the Kids)! It was a long flight, but a beautiful place where we experienced many exciting things. My first helicopter ride over the island of Molokai literally took my breath away, and a couple’s zip-lining adventure had us laughing through the air in the rain and posing with rainbows. With this trip, Adrian has now officially been to all 50 of the United States of America!!!

I completed my third full marathon while in Maui. And those were the most difficult 26.2 miles I’ve run/walked yet… Though I had trained for months, I was not prepared for the trifecta of Heat, Hills, and Humidity along the lovely Pacific coast. It took me an hour longer to complete than my other 2 marathons, but I crossed that finish line on my own two feet and came in 250 out of 552 runners! I continue to run 5K races and just posted my best time ever of 26:15.

Getting ready to run in Maui

It’s been an interesting year for me in new home sales with lots of activity some months and very little others, but it looks like I’ll finish 2018 with a strong December. I recently sold my largest home in 11 years of doing this and am excited to see it built with great views of a Delaware bay!

One other major event happened earlier this year; on February 20 my amazing Dad went into cardiac arrest and we briefly lost him. It was a frightening time, but our community came together in prayer and support and Dad miraculously recovered. We are thankful beyond words.  Then in July, Dad and Mom were able to celebrate their 40^th Anniversary.

It was another year full of life, love, struggle, laughter and tears. And we are thankful for it. And for YOU sharing with us in it.

MERRY CHRISTMAS AND HAPPY NEW YEAR!

A beautiful sunset on the Pacific that we experienced in Maui

Helicopter ride over Molokai island

The Bread Winner

The raised eyebrows of surprise. Yeah, I've seen that look many times before.

It usually follows my answer to the question, "What does your husband do for work?"

"He's a full-time Dad, caring for our three young children," I say with an expression of gratitude.

The eyebrows go up, but the replies vary.

Some say, "Well that's wonderful!" or "You're very lucky he can do that" or "Oh really?"

But on occasion I get this:

"Oh, so you make enough to support your family???"

Mind you, I try to be the type who is not easily offended, but questions like that...ANNOY ME.

I mean for real, is it so hard to believe that a hard-working, college-educated mother can be the sole Bread Winner for her family? It is 2016 after all.

My reply to the silly question is something like, "Yeah, usually." And laugh it off.

But what I really want to say is....

"Absolutely, I do. I've worked hard since I started baby-sitting at 12, then delivering pizza at 16, and waitressing through college. I pulled countless all-nighters to earn 2 bachelors degrees in 4 years of college and graduated with honors. I commuted 88 miles to work for 3 years at my first professional job out of college. And for the past seven years I have worked on commission, given up most of my weekends, delivered 3 babies and been the sole income earner for our family. It's not been easy, but my income has been pretty good. Yes, I can support my family. Oh, and did I mention that we have bought 4 homes and sold 2 of them. Sure, I've got a mortgage and imperfect finances, but our bills are paid and we live well.  P.S. I'm still nursing my 9 month old baby. Any more questions?"

That just quickly flashed through my mind is all. It clearly sounds way to egotistical and rude to really say.

And I know the real truth. I am who I am, and I provide what I do by the grace God alone. He has provided the opportunities and abilities. I have simply worked hard to take advantage of those I can. And when life forced tough decisions on my husband and I, we together decided what was best for our family.

And if someone wants to say to my husband, "Oh you're so lucky, you get to stay home all day."

He might want to come back with something like...

"You really think so? You know I've done a lot of things. Worked many tough jobs. I was a logger, a salesman, a construction manager, a painter, a small business owner, a fireplace installer, a youth leader, and an over-the-road truck driver who's been through all 50 states except Hawaii. I have three of the best kids a father could hope for and love them dearly. But for the past 7 years...did you catch that...SEVEN YEARS...I have been home with our children every day my wife is at work. I tried some at home business ideas but nothing materialized. My job is changing dirty diapers, feeding cranky kids, constantly cleaning something, folding laundry, scrubbing toilets, breaking up girl fights, working around my wife's piles of...who knows what, maintaining the lawn and landscaping, washing dishes, maintenancing vehicles and a myriad of other tasks that endlessly repeat themselves. Day after day. Year after year. It is by far, the toughest job this man has ever had. Do you want to trade?"

Of course, that would just leave them with a blank stare and probably even less understanding of the unique role my husband fulfills.

And we know the real truth. In spite of the challenges, it is an incredible privilege for him to spend so much time with our children - and snuggle often with his baby boy. For him to experience all of their "firsts" and be the one influencing their futures. And by providing all he does, he makes it possible for me to provide how I do. We just wish it FELT this warm and fuzzy more often!

We are a Team. I may be the Bread Winner, but he is every bit as much the one who supports our family.

Questions are good, they show you care. Just try to avoid the silly ones ;) And cheer us on. We really need the extra support some days. We all do.

I hope you don't mind a little sassy post!

The Proposal

Valentine's Day 2003. It was the only year I went on a Valentine's date with my boyfriend.

Prior to that, I was always single on February 14. And since that year, I have always spent Valentines with my husband. Because on February 15, 2003 I became engaged...this is the story of our Proposal.

Spring 2003 - Adrian and I with another engaged couple at the LU Junior/Senior Banquet... both couples still married!

It was a special date night. Adrian and I had been dating about nine months when he drove down to Virginia again to meet me at college and take me out for dinner. We dressed up and he brought me to a fancy restaurant in downtown Lynchburg. Of course, he brought me flowers. He spoiled me with flowers while we were dating, and even now he surprises me with them on occasion. (Like stopping by my office on Friday with our little girls and a bouquet of purple roses...I was in the middle of a sales appointment, but my clients didn't seem to mind the interruption! I certainly loved it.)

After our romantic dinner that Valentine's night, Adrian and I went back on campus to Liberty University to watch a Coffee House show...basically a talent night for students to perform. The acts were entertaining but the bonus of these nights was that students were allowed to stay out past curfew... Yes, Liberty had some conservative rules including an 11 p.m. curfew on weeknights and midnight on weekends. (You might laugh at this if you went to a state college, but it generally didn't bother me.)

Halfway through the show, we decided to step outside so that we could spend more quiet time together walking and talking. Technically, I was supposed to return to my dorm room at that point, but maybe I had a bit of a rebel inside that didn't care about the curfew. I was with my boyfriend on Valentine's after all! This was something new and different.

Adrian walked me to one of the highest points on campus. There, we climbed a lift that was next to the football practice field. On this night, that lift provided a romantic retreat with a wonderful vantage point of the city lights and mountains in the distance.

It was sometime after midnight as we stood together silently for a while, appreciating the peaceful view, all the while Adrian's arms were wrapped around me against the chilly night air.

He broke the silence with barely more than a whisper in my ear... A poem. I listened, quickly realizing it was a poem he had written and memorized for me. My heart started pounding faster as the poem ended with... Will you be my Wife?

Barely visible in the darkness, his hand opened in front of me with a small box. The Box. It held a lovely ring with a trio of diamonds.

I was shocked. Kind of nervous. Pretty excited. Was this really happening? I had just turned 21 the week before. Was I ready to be a wife???? But this Guy...they don't make them like this much anymore. Sensitive, romantic, intellectual. This man would be a great husband and life partner. And I loved him.

I said Yes! He placed the ring on my finger. We Kissed. (This was also technically forbidden on campus at Liberty...but do you think I cared?)

Here's the ring he gave me that night...and a Pandora bracelet he gave me a couple years ago.

Adrian later told me that he intentionally waited until after midnight to propose, so it would be February 15. He knew I would not appreciate something cliche like a proposal on Valentine's Day. Smart guy! Hahaha...

(p.s. Don't let this taint your experience if you had a Valentine's Day proposal!)

In all honesty, when I returned to my dorm room that night and showed my roommate the ring on my finger, I was more afraid than excited. I seriously never thought I would get married so young. Three months later I graduated from college with a ring on my finger. Six months after that, we said "I do."

And here I sit 12 years later with that same ring on my finger and thankful to be carrying another child from this Guy. We have created a life and family together and traveled many a bumpy, yet exciting road along the way.

I am so glad I said YES that February 15...many years ago.


For more details on how we first met, check out this post: HAPPY 10TH ANNIVERSARY TO MY CHILDHOOD CRUSH. Read a little of Adrian's perspective on our life and marriage: TEN YEARS AND COUNTING...IN HIS WORDS.

She wants a little brother (and a big one!)

The conversations we have with our daughters are amusing to say the least. Especially Adria...she started talking pretty fluently by the time she was two. Johanna has not quite kept up.

The other day my five year old started a conversation while I was catheterizing her on the changing table. Normally, she likes to play "I Spy with my Little Eye" while we take care of her needs, but this day she had something else on her mind.

My 5 year old dresses as "peacock" by day and contemplates life's big questions by night.

It went down something like this...

"Mommy, I really want a little brother." - Adria

"Oh yeah? Do you want Mommy to have another baby?" - Me

"Yes! And a big brother too!" - Adria

"Whoa! Slow down. Why do you want a brother?" - Me

"Silly mom, we need a brother in our family!" - Adria (Naturally, this is the way of things to a 5 year old)

"I don't know, honey. If mommy had a baby it could be another girl." - Me

"No, it would have to be a boy. There are already two girls!" - Adria (Since we obviously get to choose these types of things...)

"I know, and I love my two girls. It might be fun to have a little brother." - Me

"And a big brother too!" - Adria

"Now that would be very difficult. Mommy can't have a baby older than you!" - Me (Of course, adoption could make this happen, but that's not something we plan to pursue.)

"But Mom, I really want a big brother. I need to marry him when I'm grown up." - Adria (Ohhh, there's the reason...but where did that come from?)

"Sweetie, people don't marry their brothers. That's not how it works." - Me

"But Daddy is your brother." - Adria (Wonder why she thinks that?)

"Daddy is not my brother. Uncle Cam and Uncle Aaron are my brothers. I can't marry my brothers, silly." - Me

At this point, she gets a deeply troubled look on her face as apparently my words crush the framework of logic this little girl had established in her mind. And I really have no idea where this idea that we marry our brothers came from. She's almost teary-eyed as she responds.

"But Mom, then who will I marry? Who will be my husband?" - Adria (Sigh, isn't that basically life's biggest question for every woman...and my 5 year old daughter is asking me! I know many fantastic women my age and older who are still hoping for an answer to that question.)

"I don't know, Adria, but I hope that one day you meet a man who loves you and wants to marry you. Daddy loves Mommy and that's why we are married. You don't need to worry about that now, sweetie." - Me (Let's go back to talking about the little brother...that was easier!)

This is not the first conversation we've had about needing a little brother or wanting to get married - you can read that one HERE. But it was my first time hearing about needing an older brother to marry. After I relayed this conversation to Daddy, he said that she's asked him about that before. Who knows where they get these ideas? She does have two girl cousins with older brothers, but still.

Hanging with her friends. Maybe one of these boys could be her future husband?
Hahaha! - they are the sons of my two good friend Normie and Kathleen.

But man, in one conversation she wants to cover everything from Mommy having more babies to her future life partner. These are not easy discussions!

At least it was much lighter than a conversation that she had with Daddy not too long ago, where she asked a lot of questions about Why she is different. He's better at handling those I think.

I have a feeling that we are in for many deep conversations over the years with this little girl. Her mind is always going and finding the path it believes is most logical. I hope this serves her well in life.

She certainly knows how to put Mommy on the spot!

Imagine if...an Angel appeared 15 Years Ago

Imagine this...

It's the morning of June 3, 1999 and I'm trying to put together a valedictorian speech to deliver at my high school graduation later that day. I lost my original speech during our class trip, so I'm trying to think of something intelligent and inspiring to share.

Suddenly an Angel appears. I am in awe. She sees my dilemma and offers assistance.

"Would it help provide inspiration if I gave you a glimpse into your life 15 years from now?" the Angel asks.

"Wow, YES! At least I think so," I eagerly respond.

"You must be sure, for I will reveal a great deal of things," the Angel adds.

"Go ahead, tell me," is the reply of this naive and blindly optimistic 17 year old.

The Angel proceeds...
"In 15 years you will have been married 10 years to a handsome man who has been a faithful and loving husband.
Together you have two beautiful daughters, who are your greatest joys.
You have lived in 3 new homes, and you now live on a large wooded lot in the country.
You earned two college degrees, graduating with honors.
You have a successful career in sales and marketing.
You have provided more than 100 families with new homes.
You finished a marathon run.
Your husband and you became youth leaders and part of the church leadership.

You visited more than a dozen countries, walking on ancient roads and pristine beaches.

You have friends and family all around you.

You are strong, healthy and well."

The Angel pauses. I'm amazed and smiling.

"Really? Thank you! What did I do to deserve such a blessed life?!" I ask her.

"There is more," the Angel continues...

"On this day in 15 years you will spend seven hours sitting in a children's hospital.
Your oldest daughter was born with spina bifida, and she requires doctors to assist you in her lifelong challenges with mobility, incontinence, and more.
Your husband has endured life-altering seizures for more than three years. He loses strength in his body and many memories fade away as a result of this trauma.
You have wiped pools of blood off your kitchen floor, more than once.

You are solely responsible for providing your family's financial needs.

You do this by working most weekends.
You have moved more than a dozen times.
You have made choices that cause permanent wounds to those you love most.
You have cried alone countless nights.
You have watched friends lose parents, husbands and babies.
You carried a child that you never met.
You underwent emergency surgery on your 29th birthday.
You faced a time of deep depression after your second daughter's birth.
You stopped regularly attending church and almost stopped praying for a time.
You have been so afraid or hurt that you have lost consciousness several times.

You often feel empty and lost as you watch your life fly by in a blur of joys and sorrows.

You almost lost everything, yet you still have so much.

That is what is to come in your life, Julleanna. Does that help you at all?" she concludes.

Suddenly, I feel sick to my stomach. The beautiful vision of my life has been tainted with surprising realities. It's too much to take in. Too much to conceive all these things at once. Why is there so much struggle mixed with so much good? How can I put this into words? What can I say to help prepare my classmates, to help prepare myself for what life will bring? The words never come for I am too young and not prepared to know my life.

_______________________________________________________________________________

Though the angel is an imagination and clearly never appeared, the events of my life are true and real. On days when I focus on the positive, I am full of joy and hope for our future and our life as a family. But I admit that there are too many days when I question my decisions, question why my husband and daughter face major health issues, and question if I am on the right path for my life. It's a struggle. My dear husband endures this more patiently than I deserve, yet he challenges me to not dwell on these questions and emotions.

For this is Life. It is good. It is bad. It is happy. It is sad. It is exciting. It is boring. It is delightful. It is stressful. It is unexpected. It is perplexing. It is wonderful. It is terrible. It is what you make it. It is what comes your way. And it is full of as much love as you are willing to give and receive.

Maybe that is what I would have said 15 years ago on that graduation stage had I known what is to come. But thank God, an angel did not appear to foretell the future for we are rarely capable of comprehending it at once. Instead, He gives us a new sunrise every morning. Life comes one minute, one hour, one day at a time. And it is in the present day we must Live. Not dwelling on our yesterdays. Not dreaming for or dreading our tomorrows. This is something I must learn to do.

Look at the last 15 years of your life. The events may be vastly different than mine but there is likely a roller coaster of unexpected ups and downs. I hope that you can find the good and focus on the blessings and find strength of character through the struggles.

This morning, my good is seeing these little sweeties sprawled across their bed :)

  

Chasing Dreams...IN HIS WORDS

Where do you see yourself in three years? In ten years? When do you want to retire and what do you want to do when you retire? I was trained to use these questions for the short time I was a life insurance sales rep to create a connection with the people I worked with and to help them set goals, have dreams and realize the importance of providing for those goals and dreams. I was surprised to find out the number of people who didn’t have a clue for an answer to any of those questions. Whether people bought any insurance or not, I always enjoyed having the conversations with them and helping to inspire them to begin to think a little into the future. To have hopes and dreams of what they might want to do and be. Of course I always pushed them towards thinking about travel because I am very biased toward it, and it’s more affordable and less traumatic than actually moving.

I have always been a dreamer, not one to walk the straight and narrow but one to hike over the mountains just to see what’s up there. I think that’s what ultimately brought Julles and I together because she is much the same way. We each have our own individual dreams, some of which have had to be put aside for the sake of having a family, but we also have our dreams of what we want to do and be as a couple and as a family. Yes, there are moments that we cry for the loss of the personal dreams that we had to lay aside for the sake of achieving the larger dream of having a family, but those dreams may not be gone forever. My own is that I would much rather be living close to the Canadian Rockies. I won’t bother you with the why’s and where’s, but that’s what it is. I feel its pull every day but it can’t be. A personal dream must be sacrificed in pursuit of achieving a much larger family dream.

I personally believe that our dreams and all the time we spend talking about our dreams is one of the things that has helped hold Julles and I together through the many trials that our marriage has faced in the ten years we have been together. The stress of everyday reality, bills, unmet needs, and a plethora of other things can tear a marriage apart. That’s why the current divorce rate is close to sixty percent. But having and talking about dreams as a couple breads hope, it brings life into the relationship, it lets you know that no matter how bad today is another day in another place will be much better. It will also make you stop thinking, talking, and blaming each other for your current tough situation.

A long time personal dream of mine has been to visit Spain and Italy. I love the language, food, wine, and the people I have met from there. This January the stars finally aligned for that dream to become a reality, and I was able to travel to Spain with my sister Leona where another sister Angela is stationed with the military. We spent three days in Rome, Italy and ten days traveling through Spain including a trip to Gibraltar. It was better than I even imagined it would be and was smooth traveling because Angela knew all the quirks of international travel. The whole opportunity came when I least expected it and worked out better than if I had been planning it for a year. That’s the beauty of having and holding on to dreams. I am currently fulfilling another lifelong dream of learning to play the piano.

First day in Europe - Madrid, Spain

Adrian's travel companions, younger sisters Leona and Angela

View outside the Coliseum in Rome

Sitting in an ornate garden in Barcelona

So where do you see yourself in three years? What about in ten years? Where have you traveled and where would you like to travel? What are you and what would you like to be? Are you living your life or is your life living you? Have dreams and hold onto them because they want you as much as you want them.

~ Adrian Seely

Adrian dreaming on the shores of the Atlantic Ocean in Spain

She wants a Prince...and a baby

Last night as I was giving Adria a bath, I remarked on how tall she is now almost filling up the length of the tub and how I remember giving her a bath when she was just a little baby.

Her response. "Mommy, when I grow up I'm going to have a baby like you. Will that make you happy when your daughter has a baby, so you can have a baby again?"

"Yes, that will make Mommy happy, but that's a looooooooong way away!" I said. Really, I don't want to be thinking about my five year old being a mother...yet. She's not even in kindergarten, and she regularly talks about getting married and having children. I'm so not prepared for this stuff, even if I do find it a bit amusing.

Adria begins her love of babies as she helps mommy give her newborn baby sister a bath
(Dec 2011)

It makes me think of that day when we were sitting in the maternal fetal medicine office after hearing about Adria's diagnosis, and we were learning about spina bifida for the first time. We were trying to grasp what type of life our unborn daughter could expect. They told us that because of the damage to her spinal cord, she would likely have limited sensation from her waist down. I remember being concerned and asking if she would be able to have children. They said it would be possible, in fact one of their patient's was a pregnant woman who had spina bifida. That gave me a measure of peace for my little girl.

Adria regularly asks me questions like, "Mommy, when I grow up will I have a handsome prince like you?" Ah so cute. I do hope so. Though I know the fairy tale dream of a prince that she sees in so many children's books and shows is so very different from the reality.

My Prince with our little princesses.

Yes, I am blessed with a handsome "prince" who treats me well, especially when he's healthy. But I have so many friends who are still hoping and dreaming that there is a man out there for them, while others suffer the heartbreak of love lost, and still many more live daily with a man who frustrates them to pieces.

Indeed on an especially tough day, you might catch me changing the final words in one of the girl's storybooks. For instance instead of the tale of Beauty and the Beast ending with "The Beast transforms back into the Prince, and the two live happily ever after."  I might say something like "...and the two faced many surprises in life and had to work hard to grow in love and support their family."  I know, I know, that takes some magic out of the fairytale, but sometimes it's ok to throw in a reality check. Don't you agree?

Yet, I hold out hope that she'll find a great prince because there are many wonderful mothers I know who are raising young men. Consider this my thank you, mothers of little boys. Thank you for loving on your little men and teaching them the best way you can to be respectful and thoughtful (of course I know it often doesn't seem like they're listening.) Keep at it, and we'll do our best to raise a couple gracious and loving little princesses.

And if your little man does happen to capture my daughter's hand...many, many, many years from now... I have a message for him.

He needs to buy her pearl earrings on their third Christmas together.

She requested this one night as I was putting her down to bed and she commented on my pretty pearl earrings. I told her Daddy gave them to me before she was born. She said, "When I grow up, I want my husband to buy me those earrings on our third Christmas." Duly noted, my dear. I have officially notified some potential future mother-in-laws :)

Oh my dear sweet daughter, I hope and pray that you will one day meet a wonderful prince who loves you tenderly and leads you confidently. And I hope that you'll experience the joy of motherhood.

Failed 2013 Resolutions...Try Again?

Without even realizing it, I was taking the advice that my husband shared in the last blog. Instead of just asking "Why" to life's challenges, I was trying to move beyond into "How do I move on from here?"

I saw the beginning to 2013 as a great opportunity to refocus and motivate myself. For various reasons, the year before was incredibly challenging for me, but mainly I think it was due to battling with post-partum depression. I had no issues with it after Adria's birth, but in spite of Johanna being a beautiful and healthy baby girl, my hormones played games with my emotions for much of the year. Though I tried to hide it from the public, Adrian had never seen me struggle so much to bring myself out of a funk. The only redeeming aspect was that it helped me to better understand Adrian and his battles with depression.

As I began to see the rainbow through the clouds, I put together a list of New Year's resolutions to guide my thoughts and efforts. I recently found the list in a notebook, followed by pages of notes about interviews and To Do lists for moving. I did not expect to fill the notebook with all that when I wrote the list on January 8, 2013.

Maybe the list was a bit over-ambitious, but I had reason to believe that many of these goals could be achieved with our lifestyle in Virginia. In the end, the last item on the list was really the only one that was achieved...but arguably that was the most important one.

Here's the list of my goals and dreams for last year, along with some explanation.

1. Sell 40 Homes - 5% of Region's total

2. Achieve Senior SMR status

3. Sell out of Cedar Run and move to Chesterfield community

• These first 3 goals all had to do with my job as a new home Sales and Marketing Rep with a large national builder. I had worked for this company for 6 years and in 4 different states. The Richmond region was truly dynamic with great people and was experiencing incredible growth, and I was hoping to be a part of their goal to sell around 800 homes in 2013. I was disappointed to have to leave so suddenly in April when we moved back to DE, but I know they did great!

4. Establish Regular Date Night with Adrian

• As a working mom, my dear husband can sometimes feel like he's not a priority with my work and my girl's needs always taking my attention. Time alone as a couple needs to be planned or it won't happen often. We are getting better at this with lots of family around now to help with babysitting.

5. Run 2 Half-Marathons

• This shouldn't have been too hard, since I ran the Indy 500 half-marathon in May 2012 (six months after Johanna was born) but I never really committed last year. I jogged regularly, but did not do a long, organized run.

6. Write - Housing Market Richmond Examiner

• I knew I wanted to get back into some writing and thought I'd try this route. Back in 2010 I had started a "Working Mom Indianapolis -Examiner," but things in life changed after the first few articles and that's where it ended. Though, I never signed up with Examiner.com, I did start this blog and have enjoyed writing again!

7. Attend Church 2x a month

• As a new home sales rep, I've spent the last seven years working 3 weekends a month. Yes, that gets very old, but it's necessary in this career. However, it made it very difficult for us to get to church regularly, though I did find a few great churches in Indiana and Virginia. With my new job, I do have off two weekends a month, so this has become an easier goal. You don't need church to be a Christian, but I have learned that my heart longs for the fellowship and corporate worship that church should provide.

8. Write a short children's book

• This is still on my list, and I think that I will get to this in 2014. I have so many ideas, it's just getting them on paper and then the work (which I dread) of trying to find a publisher.

9. Get Adria established with bowel program

• I actually feared this resolution the most. My precious little 4 year old, who was very capable in almost every way, could not empty her bowel properly (i.e. she's not able to poo like most of us). It was a stinky problem with no easy solution. We tried many different techniques last year, and we are fairly pleased with the success of our current routine. This is huge, because Adria is now 5 and we don't want her to be embarrassed by stinky diapers in pre-school. Now...my goal is to potty-train her 2 year old little sister by the end of spring. It'll be our first traditional potty training experience, and it scares me almost as much!

While I did fail on achieving most of this list, it doesn't bother me too much. As you know if you've been reading along these last few months, 2013 was another wild year for us with unexpected events and big surprises. Some were difficult and others were incredible. While I think it's important to set realistic goals in life, it's even more important to be flexible when the attainment of those goals gets out of reach.

As we sit on the horizon of 2014, I dare to be encouraged and hopeful for the good things to come this year. And just maybe, I'll get to some of those resolutions that I missed last year.

Did you set any goals or resolutions for this year? Or achieve any from last year? I'd love to hear about them!

 

Christmas Letter 2005

Just before Christmas I had posted the first Christmas letter that I ever wrote. It became a tradition, so I'm doing a little series of posts at the end of 2013 with these letters to provide a "Year in Review" for this Seely family. It's very interesting for me to read these and remember those times and have the knowledge of what was to come.

The year 2005 was a very busy year for us, and that year did involve two moves...

Christmas Letter 2005

Merry Christmas Friends and Family!
We hope that you had a wonderful Christmas and wish you a Happy New Year! We say that because most of you will probably receive this after Christmas. Sorry for the delay, but that’s what happens when you move the week before Christmas. Yes, we just finished making our second move of the year, and that’s just the beginning of what has happened in our lives in 2005. 

Home

It was early this year when Adrian’s parents offered us some land outside of Greenwood to build a home. After months of taking steps toward making this new home a reality, we just signed the loan this past week and we are ready to break ground and begin construction. Naturally, we are very excited about this!

As for our moves, in June we had the opportunity to move from our apartment in Bear (we moved there from Greenwood in Aug. 2004) to rent a home near downtown Dover. For various reasons this turned out to be a great move for us, and we enjoyed our short time in the state’s capital. However, last weekend we moved back to Greenwood due to some unforeseen events. In October Adrian’s Grandma, Lena Seely, passed away, leaving her house in Greenwood empty. We were given the opportunity to stay there and received approval from our landlord to break lease early in order to do so. This move is a huge blessing in many ways, specifically because the house is adjacent to where we will be building our home.

Work

The recent move is also better for our work situations. Early this year, Adrian began working with my father, Byron Outten, at his plumbing business in Greenwood. This has worked out very well for both Adrian and Dad.

Adrian and I at Nason Construction's Holiday Party

As for my job, I have been the marketing coordinator for Nason Construction in Wilmington since March 2004. Though I am now 1½ hours from the Wilmington office, the decision was made last week to create a new position for me in our Salisbury, MD office (45 min. away) that would allow me to lead the marketing and business development effort for the Delmarva Region. I am looking forward to this new role.

Church

Another reason we are glad to be back in Greenwood is to be closer to our church and the youth that we are now working with. It came unexpectedly, but in April several people at church approached us about becoming the youth leaders. After much prayer, we decided to take on the role and have thoroughly enjoyed this new experience. An average of 20 teenagers attend the weekly meetings, and a few weeks ago more than 50 came to the special worship time and pizza party we hosted – it was great!

Play

In spite of the busy year, we have still managed to squeeze in some personal fun with a couple of weekend camping and hiking trips as well as a few rounds of golf (Adrian is teaching me) and a little swing-dancing.   And in the evenings, we find ourselves amused and entertained by Max, our Jack Russell, who is quite adequately fulfilling the role of a son…for now.
 
All that being said, we hope that you have had a blessed year as well and pray God’s blessing on you this Christmas season.                

                                                                                                                With His Joy,

Adrian and Julleanna Seely

 

Our First Christmas Letter

Before I began this blog, the only literature you would have read about our lives came in the form of our annual Christmas letter. I started writing them the year after we got married, and I think I've sent one out about every year since with our Christmas card. You may never read them, but I enjoy the annual updates and photos from people when I get them in the mail.

I just discovered that I still have all of these letters on my computer. So guess what? You can read them all. It'll be a little snippet of our last decade. Keep in mind, I do try to keep an upbeat tone in these, no matter what REALLY went down that year.

Here is our First Christmas Letter - December 2004

One year down, 99 to go (or something close). Yes, November 22 marked our first year of wedded bliss…and blissful it has been. We will spare you too many of the details but thought you might be interested to know just a few. It’s been an eventful year with a new job, home, and family members.

First and foremost, it is no longer just the two of us. Our young son joined us in January, and he is simply the most adorable pup you will ever see. We’re not kidding. Our little Jack Russell’s name is Max, and we only hope that our children will be as cute and obedient.

We’re also proud to be Aunt and Uncle again, as Adrian’s brother and sister-in-law gave birth to their second beautiful daughter in August. We hope to follow in their footsteps one day, but we’re very patient about that.

In March, Julles was blessed to land a job that utilized many of the skills she gained during college. Though she never anticipated working in the construction industry, she is now happily employed as a Marketing Coordinator for Nason Construction, Inc. in Wilmington.

We still lived in good ‘ole Greenwood for a while, but the long commute encouraged us to pack our bags and move an hour north in August. We rather enjoy our third-story apartment in Bear, Del.

Adrian still owns his own business, APQ Painting, but now has the longer commute. For most of the past year, he’s been acting as assistant superintendent as well as painter for a townhouse project in Easton, Md.

That’s probably enough details for now, as we know you need to get back to baking or wrapping gifts or other holiday preparations. We truly hope that all is well with you and that you have a blessed Christmas!

Love,

Adrian, Julles and Max  

 

 

 

Ten Years and Counting...IN HIS WORDS

My husband felt inspired to share some words following our trip last week. It is amazing to see where our relationship has come over these years. We have enjoyed many happy times and almost as many stressful, broken times. Many nights of tears and me feeling like a failure as a wife. Yet even in our marriage, when we fall down, we get back up again. Our love has grown and it is the on-going daily choices that bring us to this milestone. Thank you Lord for seeing us through the tough times and for this man. I'm looking forward to celebrating our 30th anniversary on 11/22/33!

IN HIS WORDS... 

On November 22, 2013 my wife and I celebrated our tenth anniversary by spending several days in Virginia Beach. It was a wonderful trip made even more special by things we couldn’t have planned like a seventy degree sunny day for our anniversary day, free tickets to places we wanted to go, and a spontaneous horse ride down the beach in front of our hotel. Because this was our tenth anniversary we thought that was kind of special.

I don’t know why but there is something about ten that seems a little more special than six, or eight, or even nine so instead of just going out to dinner we wanted to do what our means could afford us so we splurged on a four day vacation to celebrate this ten year anniversary, and it was while we were on this vacation that we began to realize what an achievement it is in this society and age to reach ten years.

Almost as soon as we got to Virginia Beach and began to answer the question of “why are you here?” with “it’s our tenth anniversary” we began to notice a theme because of the often response of “wow, you made it that long!”. It didn’t take us long to realize that making it ten years really is quite an achievement and worth celebrating to the best of your ability. It also reminded us and impressed upon us the importance of taking time for each other. It is so easy to get busy with life that we forget that for a marriage to work, it takes work and a lot of it but it also takes fun, laughs, walks in the moonlight, dinner by candlelight or whatever else it is that allows the two of you to connect on every level; mind, body, and soul because without it you may well become part of the ever increasing divorce rate.

The issue of divorce has become such an issue that it was actually the basis for the sales pitch of a time share that we took two hours of our day to go listen to. They offered us so much free stuff that we couldn’t pass it up and we were kind of curious about it anyway. It just really surprised me that they would go as far as to use the issue of divorce which, according to them, is primarily caused by couples not spending enough time together i.e. not owning a time share, to sell time shares. When we said no thanks, we were basically told our marriage would fail if we didn’t immediately purchase a $26,000 time share. What a joke.

It is a little disturbing that we ran into the issue of divorce so much while celebrating our tenth anniversary but a lot of it was talking to people whose lives had been touched by it who were surprised we made it ten years. I think it’s also a good reminder of the amount of focus we need to have on each other as supposedly the 10-20 years are the hardest. Focusing on your marriage is an easier thing to do when you are busy living life and doing the things you purpose to do. But when life is busy living you, hitting you with the things it purposes for you and you are busy trying find a way to adjust to it, it is much more difficult to remember to take the time to do those things for your marriage. However, I am confident that our next ten years will be full of love, life, and adventure.  

- ADRIAN